Misfits Mid-Life Crisis……..

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique and South Africa.

Week 12.

This week I have mainly been listening to….. Blur, The Chemical Brothers, Basement Jaxx, Morrissey, Lana Del Ray, Nirvana, Bob Marley, Moby, Elbow, Coldplay, P.J Harvey.

And have been watching…. Breaking Bad (season 5), Doctor Who “Robot of Sherwood” (episode 3, season 8/34), The Great British Bake off (season 4, eps 6, 2013), Doctor Who “Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS” (season 7/33).

Saturday, was a busy day starting with an Ocean Safari. During the trip we had some humpback action from a far and saw a devil ray and yellow fin tuna jumping (not together). It was at the end of the safari that things hotted up, a Mother and baby humpback doing what humpbacks do best. As always I couldn’t take my eyes off these beautiful creatures. Later I went for a run, there is no PIGWATCH as the pig was not spotted I suspect she was with her piglets preparing for new Doctor Who. Once home jumped in the shower and quickly changed as I had been invited to a beach front braai (a BBQ) a couple of guest that had dived and been on safari were having a meal. Sitting helping make salad almost on the beach front with people from Germany, Italy and other nationalities made me feel very cosmopolitan and European I liked that. I had to leave just after 8 to get home for 8.30 (7.30 UK time), its Saturday, its new Doctor Who. I watched the episode on Skype, really enjoyed it even when the screen looked like a pizza had been smeared over it…lol.

Sunday started with a double tank, first Manta reef, unfortunately no Mantas were seen in fact the viz was so bad it was almost impossible to see your hand in front of your face. Saw a couple of turtles chasing each other though. During the surface interval we had a whale shark, she wasn’t huge but what a stunner, at one point she swam right under me her back fin going straight between my legs. I just stayed still in the water I didn’t want to move as I didn’t want to touch or upset her. The second dive was at Mikes Cupboard, the viz was no better but we did have another turtle that’s about all I can report. Going home we had a few dolphins but as ever there so quick we didn’t get in with them. Then the best moment we got buzzed by three humpbacks a mother and baby plus male escort who came so close to us, we could see there shadows almost under the boat and a close look at their fins just under the surface. This trio were very chilled it was them who came over to see us, that’s how it felt anyway. It’s been a bank holiday weekend in Mozambique, Tofo today was really busy, lots of cars, lots of people. Music coming from sound systems on the back of trucks packed with people, the general atmosphere was like a party. I have heard that I am leaving for South Africa now on Tuesday morning at 3.30am I have a lift there, not sure how I’m getting back. I did a little packing this evening.

Monday 8^th September 2014, the breaking news is that there is a baby on the way. My brother Paul and his lovely wife Sigrida are having a baby, congratulations to them both the news is wonderful. Other than that there is no other world news today. Tofo is quieter today after the bank holiday weekend. I went on 2 really nice dives which were better than yesterday, you could actually see in front of you. We had viz of maybe 10 metres; I was sweeping at the back a lovely easy group of divers. I’ve been preparing the stuff I’m taking to SA, just in case I’m there a couple of days I have a change of clothes, toothbrush, camera and computer. I am also making sure that everything is charged as I don’t really know what to expect to be honest. I Skyped with SAZ and her lovely family on holiday in Cornwall and Mum and Hel in Northamptonshire. Showed Bigit around her new home for a few days she met her housemates Tiger and Tank, I will really miss then while I’m away.

About an hour before I left, I discovered 2 things, one Doctor Who was on (season 7/33”Journey to the centre of the TARDIS”) I couldn’t watch it all as I had to leave but saw most of it. The other thing I discovered was that my dongle is not working has it broken or just run out that’s what I need to find out. The moon was beautiful I didn’t really need a torch walked to Mozambeats, coz it was 3am I wore jeans and a jacket, I didn’t need them once at Mozambeats I changed in the middle of the dirt road in the dark. Met Ray and the other 2 travelling with us, just after 3.30 we were on our way. There was quite a lot of fog/mist patches as we left the local area. We stopped at 7.30am about half way in to our trip. We arrived at the Mozambique/South African border about 10.50 am; we had to go through two different sections showing passports and being stamped along the way. Once finished at the boarder we made our way to Nelspruit about 150km away, we made good time arriving at Funky Monkeys at 12.30pm. I have a room to myself as I didn’t fancy a dorm. I then got a cab and went in to town, found the post office (we don’t have a postal service in Tofo) so sent a couple of things to people I care about. Bought some toiletries I’m running low on a few things. I had a few problems finding the dive shop; once I did I bought some new gloves, booties and a mask and snorkel, quite cheap really. Had fish and chips at “Fishaways”, I see their ads on SA TV all the time, very disappointing really was, almost cold chips and the fish was tiny. Spent the evening at Funky Monkey fighting with the wifi, which was not great. I’m looking at leaving Nelspruit tomorrow about noon to Maputo, the adventure continues…..

Wednesday, and I’m a woman with a plan. Didn’t sleep well at Funky Monkeys this might be because I had the return journey on my mind. I was up early watched a couple of Breaking Bad season 5 at 9am my cab arrived. I found Greyhound buses first so went with them and booked a ticket for the 13.30 to Maputo. I had hours to kills, I walked about, I spent time in the Greyhound office reading and then I got hungry. I ended up in KFC as it was just over the road, it really wasn’t very nice, I know people that class this as food, I don’t. The bus came and I left Nelspruit, my time in SA had ended really quickly. I arrived at the boarder at 16.45(ish) got my stamp I was back in Mozambique finishing up in Maputo at 18.45. After a short cab ride I made it to Fatima’s backpackers, where I booked a ticket for 5am shuttle bus to Tofo. I also had to book a dorm room as I couldn’t just sit there and wait for 5am, I didn’t want to sleep in a dorm I’m old for that so I decided to just stay in the bar. I made friends with a cute black puppy a Labrador that lives there.

I sat there in the bar all alone and used up the juice in the laptop and the Kindle, made them last all night not getting any sleep. At 5am I was outside and got taken with someone else to the bus station and shown our ride. The bus was not big it had an open trailer behind for belonging. I got on sitting at the back, I didn’t use the trailer I stuffed my gear under my legs and on top of them. We sat there until 6.40am people continually came up to the windows trying to sell bread, apples, razor blades, socks all kinds of strange products. When the bus finally left at 20 to seven the bus was full, we made 3 pit stops each time everyone was glad to be on their feet and out of the bus. The last stop I had to pay 10mts to use the loo, these were the cleanest and most well maintained bogs I have visited in Mozambique so 10mts was well worth it. During the trip I was able to nod off now and then, remember I haven’t had any sleep in over 24 hours. Even with the windows open it was very hot, summer is round the corner here and it is getting hotter every day. Once I saw Inhambane I knew where I was and felt that home was not far. However we ended up sitting in the bus station for what felt like ages, the bus station is such a busy place full of people and small buses. Finally we carried on our journey we made regular stops to drop off people and belongings, in the end there were just 4 of us left going to Tofo. When we stopped at the petrol station (the one I run too) we all took the opportunity to buy supplies. I got off to Tofo and off the bus at 4pm, I felt tired and dirty but so happy to be back in the little town by the sea that I have really come to love. The last few days I have travelled many miles, crossed the border and visited a little part of South Africa. SA is a huge country and is somewhere that I would like to explore more, but it’s good to be home….

Friday, was shop day it was good to be back at Liquid. I had been told about a new member of the Liquid team, Alice the cat. Alice is a tom cat and called Alice after Alice Cooper (who I met a long time ago) this is due to a little black patch on his face and he has a long tongue. When I opened the door there was Alice slumped on the cushions relaxed, he totally owed the place. He was not locked in all night he has found a way to get in; it appears that he has been hanging about since Tuesday. Alice kept me company all day, laying on me or sleeping next to me. I made sure that he had fresh water; I had chicken and rice for lunch so I shared the chicken with him. This evening I bought some Whiskers which I will take in tomorrow, I am determined not to get too hung up on this fellow. The birds that hang about in the trees and branches are not as pleased about the new neighbour; they were making a huge racket when Alice was sitting below their branches looking up. Let’s hope that Alice doesn’t bring us a present in the morning. Thomas took my computer to a friend who has managed to sort out the problem that wouldn’t allow me to use my dongle. It’s all working at the moment.

Been a busy week, spent time in Mozambique and South Africa, not sure how many miles I travelled in 3 days but I did enjoy it. I will have to do the visa run again in early December if I decide to stay after 1 November which is when I’m due to return at the moment. If I do have to do the visa run again, I might pay the little extra and fly I don’t know if I can really do that bus trip again.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 11.

This week I have mainly been listening to…. Morrissey, Ladyhawk, Suede, Dido “here with me”, Beastie Boys “Intergalactic & Sabotage”, Nirvana “MTV Unplugged”, Oasis, Fleetwood Mac.

And have been watching…. Blackadder the Forth (all 6 episodes), Demolition Man, Doctor Who: ”Into the Dalek” (eps 2 season 8/34), lots of VH1 80s and 90s great music videos, Breaking Bad (season 5), Top Gear (BBC Entertainment).

Saturday started with a run, it was already very hot at 7.30 am and also quite windy. The important thing to note is I saw the pig, it looked quite happy (Here ends this edition of PIGWATCH). When I got the petrol station out of the silence I could suddenly hear singing. Three vans/lorries stopped with maybe 20 (or more) people all standing dressed smartly and singing. This was a wedding procession it such a beautiful site brought a smile to my face. I was about to leave and start the run back to Tofo when I saw a Joseph who is one of the Mozambique guys at Liquid standing dressed smartly in the back of one of the lorries we had a very quick chat. Later I went to the beach with Tank, running and walking on the beach with a puppy is so much fun. I was ready for a Skype session with Hel so that I could see episode 2 of new Doctor Who live, but in the end Skype didn’t want to play, I only managed about 25mins of the episode will try again tomorrow.

Sunday in on shop duty, sitting here watching the world go by, I have just had two very green birds fly very close, hop about picking things up and eating. The chicks that Tiger brought in last week were green, I wonder if these are the same breed of birds. When I went home during the day yesterday I was buzzed by a couple of green birds in the garden, it went through my mind that these could have been the parents having a go at me because I didn’t do more to help….. Maybe not then!!! I spent most of the day working on the long list of sci-fi shit I have in storage, it’s a 42 page handwritten list, I’m typing it up and putting things on to order. I have photos of everything as well the idea is that I might be able to get people interested in some of it and make some money. However there are sections where I can’t read my handwriting, not good. There’s a wedding in town got a picture of one of the vans/lorries stuffed with people. Retried Skype to watch new Doctor Who, the episode was good, but as with last week I can’t see detail in the picture there are times when it’s a blurred mess, also the sound drops out now and then, but I got the story and still enjoyed it. I then Skyped with my other sister SAZ and her family chatted to my lovely niece Anaia until her brother Jesse (he is only 6 months old) throw up over dad, we had to end the call….. Bless him.

Monday, and the sea is still rough went diving to a beautiful site called Sherwood Forest we had a 6 to 7 metre Giant Manta. Two members of Liquid staff have been robbed over the last 2 nights which is worrying. Tofo is a generally safe place, from what I can tell so to have people out there breaking in at night is a little concerning. After this I hung about at the dive centre and covered shop for a little. I left a little early to go running got home changed in to my running clothes and left the house, as I closed the door I heard a unusual clunk. I put the key in and turned the lock the door wouldn’t open, I tried again and again. The lock has broken on me; the windows have bars there appeared to be no way of getting in. So off to Casa Barry with Tank and hoped that Jorge was around, phew he was just coming back from Inhambane (23k away), so we made our way back home and sat on the porch. Jorge came he had to rip the mozzie net on the front door, which has a kind of barn door hatch to it. He managed to climb in and tinker away with the lock using a folk and a knife and after a lot of effort he got the door open. This means I am unable to lock the door, which is not great when you consider the recent break inns locally. There was a lot of rain this evening and to cap the night Tiger never came home, I stayed up till 11pm regularly going out calling her name. Today one year ago I arrived in Tofo for the first time; I was here for the whole of September 2013 that month changed my life.

Tuesday, when I got up during the night I checked on the door, I barricaded a few things in front of it, I also looked out of windows to see if I could see Tiger. Carla the housekeeper arrived; I showed her and explained as best I could what had happened with the door. She then went to open a sort of shed in the garden and out pop Tiger, she’s been trapped in there since yesterday, she would have heard me calling her last night, at least she was in a dry place I suppose. I stayed in all day as Jorge said he’d be back. Yes you can guess he didn’t come round, I contacted Casa Barry who came back to me and said that he would be round tomorrow morning. I had a Season 4 Breaking Bad session watched lots of episodes and have finished the season. I looked something up on IMDB and accidently read a major spoiler….. ahhhh. Quick have another cider to forget.

Wednesday, Got to the dive shop and a dive was already being kitted out, I covered for Birgit (she was on shop) so she could dive. When they came back they told of 5 or 6 Mantas and many other wonderful creatures. While they were diving I finished my reef map, as part of the course you have to map a reef. Miki and I have done shallow site Clownfish. I borrowed some coloured pencils from the boss’s children and went about colouring it in.. My beautiful 2 ½ year old niece could have done a better job of it to be honest. I was a little embarrassed to hand it in (Art is something I’m sort of good at, even if I say so myself). Handing it in is another step towards being a DM. I popped home for a while once they had returned from the dive, mainly to check the door; Jorge has fixed the mozzie net (I actually thought he was going to fix the lock as well, obviously not). As a result I have contacted the landlord who is sending his son round tomorrow. During the day to make the door appear closed I have rigged up device using an old belt. I loop the belt round the leg of a small wicker cupboard then pass the belt under the door and pull it so that the cupboard is directly behind the door giving the appearance that the door is locked. This is in African tradition of make do and mend you see it everywhere here. Use what is around you to fix or mend something, you don’t always need to rush to a shop (there aren’t really any shops here to rush to so people have to make do and mend). In the afternoon had a great staff dive to the beautiful Sherwood Forest and guess what we had 4 Mantas who were so close. Oh possibly my best Manta experience so far. As usual my camera was full so I couldn’t take film or pics, note to self, check before the dive that its battery is charged and that there is room on the SD card. Hopefully Birgit or Leo got good shots. Sissi and Miki snorkel test took place at Mozambeats this evening. I drew the map for the dive site that they would have to brief everyone on, it was called Giants Arsehole (we have a site called Giants Castle) the map was suitably nasty looking. Miki and Sissi did so well with the actual snorkel test they kept there drink down pretty much (Sissi had a faulty snorkel). There briefing was hilarious very funny, maybe that’s how all dive briefings should be……… thinking about it maybe not. I will really miss not having Sissi around (she leaves in a few days) really nice evening out.

Thursday, I stayed at home because the landlord was sending his son over to have a look at the door. He arrived about 11ish and said he’d be back later, sure enough he was back at 2ish with another man who banged and screwed the mechanism, after a few minutes the lock was working, woo hoo. Because the housekeeper was in during the morning I popped out with tank quickly to the market to get a few things I wanted to be as quick as possible but kept bumping in to people that wanted to chat. This is really nice of course, certainly back at home people don’t stop and just talk, but I suppose because I was in a hurry I wished it wasn’t happening today. I do hope that doesn’t sound ungrateful. Skyped with Hel and mum, they have better internet at their house now this should make communicating easier, and Doctor Who session better (fingers crossed). I watched lots of Breaking Bad and Top gear, I’m a TV addict. Once the door was fixed I decided to take the advantage and go for a run. PIGWATCH, the pig was spotted eating, this ends PIGWATCH… I had a small group of children run with me for a few minutes, then a little elater this girl ran in flip flops for what felt like ages. Now and then she wondered in to the road which was a worry as traffic just thunders past, so I kept indicated that she shouldn’t be in the middle of the road. She understood me well enough to move to the side, but every now and then she moved back in to the middle of the road, I’d feel so bad if a kid (or anyone) running with me got hurt because they were in the road or a driver was not taking due care. It’s been a good slightly lazy day.

Friday is shop day, normally shop means staying helping dives go out and sorting stuff out when they return. Today I went on 2 great dives. Louis (a DMT) can’t dive due to an ear prob, kindly covered for me which was very sweet. The first dive was to a new site for me called Table Top a deep dive, nothing spectacular just a nice dive. The sound of humpbacks was so loud they were really near. As I climbed back into the boat I discovered a couple of things, first, my snorkel had come off. And second, my replacement mask strap was tearing; I’ve only had the mask and snorkel a year. I will have to do some shopping when I get back to the UK. Oh i also discovered my GoPro battery is frakked, will need to buy a new one when I get home, I won’t bother trying to charge it again. After a couple of hours back at the dive shop we went out again to Sherwood Forest, I really like this site another deep dive full of beautiful green tree corals (that’s the forest part). We had 3 giant Manta’s just hanging about, they were cleaning and being very chilled it is such a privilege to watch them, to be so close to them in their environment. The rest of the day was pretty much normal shop duty. But I’ve seen Manta’s today…. Woo hoo.

End of week 11, soon I have to go to South Africa to do my first ever boarder run, have heard many stories it will be an interesting trip. Yes I’ve had another great week; sorry to say it every week and be boring, but life here is good. I really do love Tofo.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 10.

This week I have mainly been listening to…. Elbow, Blur, Fat Boy Slim, Coldplay, M.I.A, Santigold, Morrissey, Fleetwood Mac,

And have been watching…. Finding Nemo, Toy Story, Breaking bad (finished Season 3), Doctor Who (season 8/34, eps1 by Skype), Les Miserables.

Saturday was a strange day; I got a text while still in bed to say that the morning dives had been cancelled due to boat problems. I then had the boss ring me to confirm this. I took this opportunity to get out and have an early morning run. It was hot; the run was good there is something really special about an early morning run. Most people say hello and/or wave, when you come from a place like London where you’re used to not daring to look at anyone just in case you get stabbed, and wouldn’t wave and/or say hello to total strangers it still takes some getting used to here, Tofo is such a friendly place. I really love it here. I got home and watched more Breaking Bad. Made my way to the dive shop for the 13.30 dive and found that it was cancelled, I hung round for a little while just chatting to people. In the end I made my way home and relaxed. Ok I’m going to cut to the chase, today is a special day as it’s the start of a new series of Doctor Who, the start of the 12^th Doctors era. Normally I would have been sitting in front of the TV waiting for it. But because I’m in southern Africa I have access to a number of BBC channels available in/from South Africa, however these seem to be the only place in the world that’s not showing it. Then I had an idea what if I Skyped my sis Hel, I could maybe see the opening and the credits. She agreed, Hel was babysitting for our cuz, this meant I got to speak to Thomas and Amelia which was lovely. Then the big moment, at 7.50pm UK time (8.50pm Mozambique) the show started, I saw the first few minutes including the lovely new opening credit after this I left them to carry on watching it. At least I can say I saw the start of the 12^th Doctor’s era. 

Sunday, the boat is better and I was on ocean Safari at 8am we had 5 punters the captain and me on the sea for 2 hours. We came across a turtle swimming on the surface, it swam near the boat, then appeared to take a gulp of air and dived deep. The next dive was due at 13.30, but we were delayed because we were waiting for some dive gear to come back from another dive at a different location. Around 2pm there were a few huge thunder claps which was followed by a real tropical winter shower. We left for the dive at 15.15, once at the site I dived down to depth about 15 metres with the buoy line and keeled on the sand so I wouldn’t move too much, the visibility was terrible less than 5 metres.   I waited and waited looking up at the line but no one appeared. After what felt like an age Birgit appeared and signalled that we should go up. It appears that the rest of the group lost the line when going down this was due to the terrible viz they were probably only about 10 metres from me but I couldn’t see them and they couldn’t see me. I have to admit that being at the bottom of the sea on your own is strange especially when you can’t really see anything but the sound of whales in the background is something special. After surfacing I could see the clouds where heavy dark and just waiting to unload more rain upon us. We didn’t get back to the dive shop until 5pm so it was a late finish after unloading and putting gear away. My mask strap has snapped, bugger, it was second hand and I have had it a couple of years, but still bugger. Highlight of the day I Skyped with Hel, watched the whole of episode 1 of new Doctor Who, yippee. 

Monday, started with a double tank, the first dive site was Manta Reef about 25 minutes from Tofo to the south, the water was quite smooth at first but once out in open sea it became quite rough. But all that became unimportant when we came across a Humpback mum teaching her calf to breech out of the water. Mum was essentially jumping out of the water, when you consider how big an adult Humpback is how she is able to throw herself out of the water is amazing. Then baby joined in, imagine throwing a stone and watching it bounce across the water, that’s what the baby was doing a truly wonderful site. A little later we came across 2 humpbacks who appeared to be lying on their back tummies breaking the surface of the sea, they were waving there massive fins in the air. I never ever get bored with a Humpback. The dives were good but the visibility was not great 3 to 5 metres, I was on buoy line for both sweeping at the back like a sheep dog, keeping count of the divers and making sure that everyone is going in the right direction and not wondering off. A couple of punters sucked there tanks dry so I was assigned to take them to the surface doing a safety stop on the way for 3 minutes at 5 metres. On Manta Reef we were buzzed by a Manta it however didn’t hang about just sailed past us very closely. These were two really nice dives to be honest. Once back on dry land I went in to the market and got 50mts of rice and beef, diving does make you hungry (I also didn’t have any breakfast). The stall that I went to needed you to bring your own plate and knife and folk if you want take-a-way. I spend the afternoon at the dive centre, helped put things away then took advantage of being able to leave a little early. 

Tuesday was another good day here in Tofo, ok there all good days. I went out on Ocean Safari and for the second day running we had a mummy humpback teaching her calf to breech, the baby just kept bouncing out of the water.  One of the punters who was due to leave Tofo today wanted to see a whale shark, things didn’t look good as we were on our way back to the bay after not really seeing very much. Then all of a sudden our captain spotted (they have so much experience and great eyes at seeing things in the water) a shadow in the water and sure enough we had a whale shark. We got in and snorkelled with it, this whale shark appeared to be smaller maybe 5 metres than others seen recently but still a beautiful sight. The punter was so happy she swam over to me and cuddled me while floating in the sea. Once back at the dive centre I got geared up and went straight out on a dive. Today’s dive was at the lovely shallow site Clownfish its only 10 metres at its deepest but it’s so full of life, it really is like Finding Nemo and yes there are lots of clown fish. As I swim around I could easily imagine Nemo and friends having adventures.

 Wednesday started with an early morning run. PIGWATCH, didn’t see the pig today I stopped and looked around the field but couldn’t see anything, it was obviously too early the pig it hadn’t come on duty yet. Once I was back in Tofo I did some shopping and finally made my way home. The housekeeper was there, she speaks Portuguese and I don’t so we have stunted conversations. A couple of days ago it ended up with each of us writing in the sand to help each other, I felt so stupid. After watching more Breaking Bad and Top Gear I went to the dive shop. Today’s dive was a double tank to Clownfish and Salon both local shallow reefs in the bay. I was in the water first once we reached Clownfish with the buoy line; I located the anchor point on the sea floor and tied the rope off then waited for the others to come down. The viz was shocking, it felt like I was back home in a gravel lake there were times when you couldn’t see more than 2 metres in front. There was also a very strong current as well so you had to really keep up. The second dive was a little better, not so much current but the viz was still bad. I must be strange as I did still enjoyed these dives. I had a nice evening in with tank and tiger watching TV.

Thursday I went on ocean safari with a number of customers, the sea was really rough (I know other dive centres had cancelled there dives and safari’s this morning). Sitting at the front of the boat bouncing up and down on the waves you have to really hold on tight to the ropes and ride the boat like a rodeo. We were buzzed by a number of dolphin’s which as ever didn’t hang about for long, seeing them surfing the rough sea’s is amazing. The huge highlight of the safari were three Whale sharks that we snorkelled with, getting in to the water and suddenly seeing a 5 or more metre in length fish (Whale sharks are the world’s biggest fish) never gets boring. Once back at the shop, I got kitted up straight away as I was off to Salon for a dive. The waves were not much better we were still thrown about quite a lot. I’ve been really lucky this week and have done 5 or 6 dives every one of them counts. This evening Tiger the cat brought in two presents. Two very small and young chicks, I have no idea what bird they were. One was dead and the other was alive, its dark outside and I have no idea where the nest is. I decided with a heavy sad heart there was nothing I could really do so I took both chicks out in to the garden and left them in amongst the grass and bushes (I’ve watched so much Springwatch over the years I know how much energy birds put in to producing and feeding chicks). I feel so guilty about this but I don’t think I could have done anything else.

Friday was another stormy day it’s also very windy. There was a dive but sadly I was not on it. Today I have spent most of my time with the other DMT in the classroom going over EFR (emergency first response). Demoing CPR, bandaging and other first aid and emergency skills. Earlier in the week I filmed an ice bucket water challenge this has been edited by Sissi and put on to Facebook, I think it’s an original little film. Once back at home I had a lovely shower in the back of the garden. Tonight the wind is still really strong, I can hear windows flapping about the house, so I looked about making sure that they were either closed or secured well.  We have just had a small power cut, I hope that this is not the start of a weekend without power (there have been a couple in the middle of the night during the week I know this as I never really sleep great).

The end of another week, a number of really good dives and lots of Breaking Bad watched. Life really doesn’t get any better to be honest.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 9. 

This week I have mainly been listening to…. Morrissey, Suede, Arcade Fire, Haim, PJ Harvey and Lana Del Ray, The Divine Comedy, Elbow. 

And have been watching…. Almost Human (finished season 1, its been canx), Mr Nobody, Breaking Bad (season 3), White House Down, Godzilla (the shit version), The Lego Movie. 

Saturday and I’m on shop duty, up early a quick bit of toast and off I go. The sun glasses I have used since I arrived has snapped just by the hinge, there used every day and get wet in sea water so they don’t last. I have 3 or 4 pairs of spares, out comes reserve number one. Good day at the office (dive shop) a very busy ocean safari this morning, then in the afternoon I was on a deep dive to a lovely site called Giants Castle. There was a manta at the drop point, I didn’t see that as I was assisting a client descending, but I did see the Bow Mouth Guitar Shark, a beautiful creature that just wants to swim away and be left along, nothing to worry about there. I have got too run, I only did one last week due to dive shop commitments, so after tomoz double tank I’m going to see if I can get off to hit the tarmac. My cooking gas bottle ran out this evening while boiling potatoes to make mash. I couldn’t waste the taters so I eat part boiled spuds, I have a feeling my tummy is going to hate me and fight me over this issue. Will have to look in to how I get and how much a new gas tank is. Tank the dog gets so excited when I arrive at Peri Peri divers to pick her up after work, I have to stand my ground as she would knock me flying (she is a big dog) she is such an affectionate lady. 

Sunday had a small splash of rain while walking Tank to Peri Peri, it didn’t last. The sea was looking mean. Went on an early 8am dive, I had the reel at 30 metres all went well on this drift dive, you feel that your flying over the coral. That is until we got to a point where we had to turn, and I couldn’t. I couldn’t swim in the other direction with the reel and 50metres of line deployed with the buoy on the surface, just couldn’t pull it. So I had to carry on drifting in the original direction to everyone else. I watched my dive buddies swim off and disappear in to the blue, I continued to try to swim in their direction but couldn’t, I must have looked like I was flaying about waving arms and legs around. I did think of ditching the line but the buoy floating on the surface is what the boat is following it. I also didn’t want the line to tangle on delicate coral or with marine life. In the end I did the lost diver procedure and surfaced slowly without a safely stop, as I said the buoy is what the boat follows so there they were right by me. I was annoyed and upset with myself that I couldn’t pull the line….. oh well. Everyone else when coming up on their safety stop saw a Humpback under water……nooooooo. The afternoon was more successful, I was leader of an ocean safari, about 8 punters, did the briefing and off we went. Very little humpback action today, but we had 2 whale sharks and 4 mantas, how amazing is that. Snorkelling with these ocean giants is a privilege. My camera had been put accidently on to a different setting so I didn’t bother with it, also as I was leading I felt I needed to be fully aware of where my snorkelers were. Really good safari, the water was a little rough big waves but everyone enjoyed themselves. Went for my run after and I did see the pig (PIGWATCH CONTINUES) treated myself to a pizza when I got back to Tofo, well I cant cook no without gas. Today I have been in Mozambique 2 months, it’s gone quickly. 

Its Monday and its been raining hard for a while everything is wet, there is that wet forest smell all about (i’m living close to a lot of green and trees) such a lovely way to start the day, love the feeling of wet sand between my toes. Note to self the tiles on the patio and garden get slippery when wet, I did slip but my NASA designed cushioned lardy arse stopped me from having any major damage….  Had 2 really good dives today, the first at Manta Reef, and yes I did see Mantas about 4 of them. I can never get bored or a manta. This afternoon I went to Mikes Cupboard a dive site that has these bowls (indentations that you swim inside) of coral, you dive in to the dips the bowls which are teeming with life. Saw a huge loggerhead turtle sleeping in a cave, but the highlight was 2 green turtles swimming freely in the open. One turned and approached me came within a couple of feet of me, we eyeballed each other and had a moment together. I didn’t want to move too much or blow too many bubbles as didn’t want to scare it. After work I went to Casa Barry to see my friends have a drink and a beautiful meal with a amazing sea view. 

Tuesday was my day off, what a great day. Went running at 7.30am (didn’t see the pig this morning, he/she was obviously not on duty today, maybe they were having a day off as well) it was already very hot that early in the morning, passed plenty of people walking to work. A lot of people carry what appear to be paint pots, they are old paint pots and other containers which contain there lunch and other food (Tofo is not full of painters and decorators, walking around with pots of paint just in case). After running I took my empty gas bottle to Casa Barry, it’s not far but carrying the tank was a little tough. I would walk a bit then stop before carrying on. Jorge the man at Casa Barry said that he would get me a bottle, its costs about 700mts. The new bottle should be with me tomorrow. After showering I skyped with SAZ my sister, it’s been over 8 weeks since I saw her and her little children. Had a great Skype session chatting with Anaia my little niece told me she missed me and loved me. We agreed to Skype again later. I then went out for a walk pretending t be a tourist, I took my camera and walked part of my running route. Took lots of really good picture, there is a recycling centre called Alma (Associacao de Limpeza e Meio Ambiente), I’ve passed it so many times but never gone in. I went in to the craft shop where they make wallets, bags, purses, table matts all from recycles plastic, newspaper, bottle tops, really enjoyed looking round, its all very cheap I will have to buy some stuff the money goes to help community projects. In the afternoon, I Skype with my other sister Hel and Mum, was so nice to chat with them, we have said that this should be done regularly. I later re-Skyped with SAZ again, both Anaia and nephew Jesse were up. Anaia showed me some dance moves, and in return I had to dance back. So the laptop was positioned and I danced for her. If the security services such as MI5, MI6, CIA, KGB hacked in to my computer at that time they’d have wondered what this mad woman was doing, spinning about on the spot. I so enjoyed my Skype sessions, I don’t know why it’s taken 8 weeks to do it. The TV is working again, it’s not worked for a week and a half. The satellite dish is a little old; the arm of the dish had slipped. A man called Elton came to have a look, he has repositioned the arm in place with wired and tightened it, so that the dish receives the correct signal Today has been such a great day, I really have enjoyed it. 

Wednesday, back at Liquid and I got 3 dives. A double tank to Mikes Cupboard then Salon. At Mikes Cupboard I saw the loggerhead turtle snoozing in the cave again. Such a nice dive very relaxed. After a 35 min surface interval we went to salon, a shallow site that I like. Spotted a few Harlequin Shrimp, Lobster, and many Nudibranch. Another lovely dive, however the viz got more cloudy as the dive went on. In the afternoon was back at Clownfish reef to carry on mapping with Mikki. I was navigating with the compass and Mikki was drawing and noting the depth. We were down for 40 minutes and haven’t finished the map so we have to go back. Once on the surface we practiced our rescuing an unconscious diver technique  I had a slight blocked sinus today, so went to the pharmacy and got some paracetamal.   AS I descended on the last couple of dives I felt slight discomfort in the sinus. Am hoping that this is not going to be a problem and I don’t want to be ill again. When I got home I found that my new gas bottle had been delivered (thank you Jorge), it’s easy to connect (far easier than I thought) I can cook again. It’s been a wet day (been in the sea 3 times) a satisfying day really. 

Thursday, and yes I’m ill again, bugger. I’m a little bunged up in the left sinus, so to be safe no diving for me. After spending a few hours at Liquid I went home, got plenty of water from the market. I popped in to the pharmacy, they didn’t have any nasal sprays, the pharmacist did try to give me something to rub on my forehead, I didn’t buy it. As he thought my problem was the dodgy pigmentation patch of skin I have on my forehead. So on the way home I went to see the dr/nurse at Peri Peri divers. He gave me pills, again a random amount of pills that won’t actually last the recommended time he stated, but this is Africa. I went home and watched lots of Breaking Bad, am currently on season 3 now, it’s so good. Tiger kept me company until I went to collect Tank, who was as usual so pleased to see me, lots of tail wagging. I made pasta and salad with lots of garlic and onion this evening; I’m a Masterchef….lol. 

Friday was shop day for me, I have been taking the pills and feel better, tomoz I’m getting in the water to test my decent on a dive fingers crossed that all goes well. I helped set up the various dives of the day, and spent time reading fish ID books. Other than that I really didn’t do very much. It’s not been a sunny or hot winters day, in fact it’s started to blow a storm, and rained this afternoon.   I went shopping in the market for supplies I got loads for 260mts shouldn’t need anything for a few day. Walked home with Tank in the rain which was pleasant. I’m due to Skype with SAZ and Anaia later this evening which I’m really looking forward too. 

Another week has passed in Tofo. The weeks appear to be passing really quickly, I can honestly say I’m never bored here and am making sure that I enjoy this experience hugely. I’m really not far from being a Dive Master…. Woo hoo.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 8. 

This week I have mainly been listening to…. Portishead, Kate Nash, Radiohead, Lana Del ray, Kate Bush, Fleetwood Mac. 

And have been watching…. Breaking Bad (season 2), The Watch, Life of Pi, Scott Pilgrim vs the World, Stitches, Almost Human, Kick Ass, The Big bang Theory. 

Saturday, I went to Liquid for the first time since last weekend. Leo was on shop, it was nice to be back I had missed everyone. It was a quiet day; bit its going to get busy tomorrow. Today I chilled with Mikki and Sissi so by the end of the day id caught up with most of the team. Cindy the boss had to do some shopping so I went with her and her boys to a place called Machavega which is not far from Tofo but you really need transport to get there. There is a place called Yum Yum/the nursery, it’s a supermarket with a garden nursery out the back. This is a shop that people back at home could identify with, It’s not a market stall out in the open. This is a small but air-conditioned little supermarket. Because I’d not known I was going on a trip I hadn’t brought much money with me, I could have spent so much there. When we made another stop (of course I didn’t have my camera) I saw sitting on a sign 2 of the most unusual and colourful birds I have ever seen. They were multi-coloured birds like the fantastical ones Anaia my niece and I watch during “In the Night Garden” together .

Sunday was a planned power cut day all day until evening. Today we had a group of exceptional disabled teenagers and leaders/doctors who have been travelling round southern Africa. When they got back they told exciting stories of seeing a couple of whale sharks and snorkelling with them. I helped with the beach launch and got soaked; normally I’m wearing a wetsuit. Cindy the boss said I use her quad bike to go home. I had a quick lesson on how to drive a quad and I was off. That evening without power I lit a few candles and had as much fun as possible with battery power, I mean laptop and kindle and not anything kinky…. Lol.

Monday and I was out on a Dhow trip with the kids from yesterday’s safari. There with an organisation called JoLT (Journey of a Life Time) Mozambique is there last stop before going back to the UK. There were 3 Dhows, which were full, our destination is an island in the middle of an estuary, when the tide is low you can walk, when its high you cant. During our trip we saw people fishing and harvesting muscles. My hat got knocked off as the sail passed over our heads. It bobbed in the water like a turtle. We suddenly circled it and someone reached in to the water and rescued it for me, how sweet. Once at the island we met the children who danced for us. The chief said a tradition pray and we then ate a lovely meal of Crab and Calamari, rice, pasta, a local dish called Matapa (made from cassava leaves piled with garlic and flour extracted from the tubers, cooked with crab. Cashew Nuts are often added along with Coconut and other stuff to forms a green pasta), I like it had it a couple of times. We then went for a walk round the village saw the churches and the schools. It’s all rough and very much what you imagine an African village to look like. I took my turn helping to carry a girl who is unable to walk, she normally has a wheelchair, but it was not suitable for this terrain. After another Dhow trip back to mainland we waded up to our waists to get to dry land and the 4×4’s waiting to take the teenagers away. I had such a lovely day with JoLT, I really hope they have a great last few days then a safe trip back to the UK. Got back to Tofo and found that there was no power again. The power has come back, I’ve made some pasta by candle light, but am now writing this with lights on again, but the candles are at the ready when needed. Must add candles to my shopping list. 

Tuesday, not a huge amount really seemed to happen. We attempted to go on a dive in the morning but something was wrong with an engine so we coasted back pretty quickly. Pity as the dive was going to be really chilled out, me and my dive buddies. The rest of the morning was spent finishing “So long and Thanks for all the fish” the forth Hitchhikers book. I popped in to the bread shack to pay for some stuff from a couple of days ago, Alice was up to her elbows gutting squid. Didn’t look like the nicest of jobs, I had to stop and watch and felt a little sorry for the squid, as I’m a fan of them not on a plate but in the sea. I bought some oranges today, after a few minutes I only had 2 left, due to the little kids that sell bracelets and coconut bread rolls, they wanted my towel or my bracelets, in the end I gave them oranges, I felt it was better to give them something they can eat than wear. I can’t give all the time of course, but today I just felt that I should anyway I didn’t really need that many oranges. The afternoon I went running, my first since I was ill, went well. I saw the Pig which was important I get a satisfied feeling when I see the Pig (PIGWATCH). I did have a crafty Snickers and a mango drink when I got the petrol station, I’m sure that these Snickers are the bet tasting ones in the world. Of course it could just be after a 4.5k run my mind is messing with me and anything would taste the best in the world. 

It’s Wednesday and I lead my first dive, there was only one punter so it was just Kris sweeping and me and the punter. Went to a lovely deep site called Giants Castle, really enjoyed it lots. A huge Loggerhead Turtle chilling at 32ish metres, you have to admire a creature that can just lay at the bottom of the ocean chilling. Saw a huge moray swimming about looking for its hole, you normally in the day time don’t see them swimming about, it was nice to see one today. At one of the Manta cleaning stations we had a Small eye stingray, the largest stingray in the world usually about 2 metres at its widest. We hovered and watch from a respectful distance. Later as we were slowly ascending up to our safety stop depth, we were buzzed by a number of them, they approached us we don’t approach them. They came very close only a couple of metres from us and circled us, so amazing to watch them sail past there wing tips rippling in the current, was a honour and a pleasure to see them in their turf so to speak. I jumped in the pool when we returned home and had a paddle. Started the final Hitchickers book “Mostly Harmless”. 

Thursday, I opened shop then was in the pool again, as part of my DM course I have to do a tired diver tow, the pool is not big so I had to do 12 laps, I got a score of 3 out of 5. Joseph who works at the dive shop was my tired diver, he didn’t complain once about being dragged about the pool and more importantly I didn’t knock him out on the sides of the pool. Then the next skill is floating for 15 mins, I just lay there for 13 minutes. Beautiful blue sky above me I was shaded by the green and red leave of a tree’s canopy that hangs over the pool. Now and then I felt my fingers or toes or head touch the pool side so I gentle pushed myself off in to the centre of the pool. The final 2 minutes of the skill you have to have your hands out of the water. I got a 5 out of 5, I got a top score for once. I helped Joseph clean all the DCB, dunking them in a tank and draining then blowing a little air in to them. I went over the fins and wetsuits to make sure that they are in the correct order, so today was a housekeeping day. Annoyance of the day is I have lost my Owl on my necklace. I’m sure it was there earlier today. I have traced my steps, look everywhere, ‘its gone. It’s no one’s fault just one of those accident but it’s annoying as Anaia my niece really liked that Owl, it reminded me of our game where we would say back and forth “my owl” in funny voices (Guess you had to be there really). 

Its Friday, went on ocean safari and we snorkelled with 2 whale sharks, they are the biggest fish in the world. These were between 6 to 8 metres in length, there gentle giants of the sea cursing just under the surface feeding on plankton. There amazing creatures to snorkel with, you keep a few metres distance from them and you have no problems, they wouldn’t want to hurt you but you still keep your distance. Loved seeing them, everyone came out of the water with huge smiles of their faces. The afternoon was a huge dive, lots of equipment to set up, fitting wetsuits and fins and snorkels. Lots of tanks and weights to get ready, all went well everyone had the right equipment. The dive was nice; I was assisting Nadia doing a open water course. I’m not the smartest cookie I know, and I’m not a Jimmy a Sissi or Mikki (other DM and DMT’s), maybe you do have to say things to me a few more times. I thought I had what we were doing in my head, but I messed up a little and got the order of things a little frakked. It didn’t cause a problem, it’s just frustrating for me personally as I really do try to do my best. But my best never really seems to happen…… maybe next week, we can only hope I suppose. 

Its been another cracking week in Tofo on the land in the sea. Not many pics again as I have been working, but next week I will have a day off so will take some more interesting pics.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 7. 

This week I have mainly been listening to….. (watching on) VH1, Duran Duran (The Reflex), Vanessa Paradis (Joe Le Taxi), The Pet Shop Boys & Dusty Springfield (What Have I Done To Deserve This), Blondie (The Tide is High). Arcade Fire, The Divine Comedy, Lana Del Ray, Shed Seven, Morrissey, Radiohead.

And have been watching…. Pacific Rim, Breaking bad (season 2), Man of Steel, X-Men First Class, Thor : The Dark World, I Frankenstein, Little Miss Sunshine, lots of Top Gear (Season 8/9, on BBC Entertainment), The Great British Bake Off (season 4, on BBC Lifestyle).

I went to bed early last night, as I wanted to get up at 5.45am Saturday so I could go running. And I did the only people I saw on the road were people walking or cycling to work. Other than the sound of my plates of meat pounding the tarmac, the only other real noise were the cockerels waking everybody else up. Now and then there was what appeared to be mist drifting across the road, it wasn’t mist. I think this was from people baking bread, I say that as I saw a couple of woman carrying huge empty metal trays that could hold a lot of bread/rolls. As I ran back home, the sun was rising over Tofo a beautiful site. Oh must mention that the pig was spotted sleeping in its field, yes I always slow down to have a look out for it (that’s PIGWATCH over with). There was no electric this morning, but I had water so had a very quick shower (quick as I didn’t know if and when the water might run out). Today was Jimmy’s last day, he popped in and said goodbyes, he will be missed at Liquid. I then went off with Mikki and Sissi on an Ocean Safari. Plenty of humpback on the surface, we saw humpback dolphins and ordinary dolphins. Got in the water to snorkel near the Dolphins which is always fun. A nice safari, enjoyable way to start a day. The rest of the day I was on shop duty, there were a lot of people surfing and having lessons to surf. I’ve never done it so must arrange a lesson with Manni sometime. At the end of the day while stocking up on Savanna (cider) and Coke (a cola) I was told that there is another safari tomorrow and I can lead. I’ve never lead and never done a briefing, at this time I’m a little nervous fingers crossed it goes well. I better start practising…. 

Sunday was so good; it really is im not sure how it can be topped. I woke up with Tiger sleeping on the end of my pillow and against my head, how comfy were we it was a pity I had to get up. I lead the ocean safari this morning, I did the briefing and it appears to have gone well, I practiced a few times to myself and then to Sissi. The actual safari was so much fun, there was so much humpback action on the surface, we had breaching (jumping out of the water) whales 20 or less metres from us, and lots of fin slapping. It was a great safari, we had bottlenose and humpback dolphins, we got in but they didn’t want to play (which is fine), just seeing them is amazing. The afternoon I was on a mapping dive, Mikki and I have to map a reef, we were at a shallow site (as there was an open water dive going on at the same time), Mikki and I decided what system to use and how we were going to do the map. The mapping went really well, I was counting kick cycles (this determines distance travelled) while Mikki was near me drawing what he saw. We haven’t finished yet, got more to do tomorrow. But am pleased about what we have done so far. The humpback singing was so load, the captain of our boat said they were 50 or so metres away. Came home had a nice meal, now with my flatmates T&T. When I have had such a good day I worry that being happy is going to end in deserter, I think that’s why I have spent so much of my life trying not to be overly happy. I always worry that something terrible is going to happen and bring me crashing down to the ground in a pile of ashes. 

I slept so badly and felt really ill. Monday was crap. Everything ached, head hurts, I felt like death warmed up, See I knew I shouldn’t have felt so good about the great things that happened yesterday. I really felt unwell, got some advice and went and saw the Nurse/Doctor at Peri Peri divers, English wasn’t his first language and Portuguese not mine, so some interpreting had to take place from other dive shop staff. I had a Malaria test, a pin prick of blood is dropped on to a little plastic slide. The kind of thing you see in CSI, its like a small pregnancy tester. There is a little white window that slowly turned red (I assume its soaking up the blood). Once the window had turned red it then changes white leaving a thin red line. From this the Dr can tell that I didn’t have Malaria. I don’t have Malaria, but he gave me 3 lots of pills, to be taken 3 times a day (they were a slightly odd amount of pills that will last till Thursday morning only). I went to the market with Tank and got water, after this we walked and paddled on the beach. Then made myself comfy at home with T & T. 

I slept badly again, woke up at 4am and put TV on, watched an ep of QI and then part 1 of the River Nile Top Gear Africa special, so funny really is. I managed to sleep a few hours but not much more. Tuesday I still don’t feel well, still achy and just feeling like a bag of poo hanging from a stick. I went to the market with Tank and stocked up on supplies, we again went on the beach and had a paddle, to be honest Tank didn’t look that impressed really at the lovely feeling of the sea and sand on your feet. Came home put the TV on and part 2 of the River Nile Top gear special was just coming on, perfect. I just love watching Top Gear, it makes me laugh like a loon, whenever a new series comes on at home I get a little over excited. Here there on BBC Knowledge and Entertainment, even though I have seen the episodes before they seem even funnier here in Mozambique. 

Wednesday, really nothing happened due to not feeling great. I hoped that Tank might walk with Grace the housekeeper to Peri Peri, no she wouldn’t go. Which is sweet really, so Tank and I went up the hill together. In fact when I picked her up later in the day she really appeared to be pleased to see me, the love from a puppy is really special. I think today must be Top Gear day, I say this because there have been so many episodes on BBC Knowledge and Entertainment and yes I watched them all before but the law states that “you shall watch Top Gear, all the time”, I’m sure it’s the law (must consult a lawyer about that…). That’s it for today, I have nothing to say, I think you can guess that. 

I had another terrible night, I can tell you there were 3 power cuts between 1am and 3am, that’s how interesting my night was. After taking Tank to Peri Peri, I ended up on the sofa with Tiger for a few hours. At lunchtime I went out to take some pictures on the porch as I don’t have any interesting Tofo people or places pics (coz I haven’t been anywhere). I got out the pap lens and tried to snap birds, emmmmm………. none of the pics when I looked later were useable they were all so washed out that you really couldn’t work anything out. I need to experiment with settings. I’ve only really used the lens at night to take pics of the moon so far. What have I done today, ive watched more Top Gear, and not a lot else. I picked up Tank we walked home with Buster (a Fred Bassett looking) dog. I then attempted to take Buster back home to Peri Peri, but he had other idea’s. First he went to visit some other puppies who certainly make a lot of noise and are quite scary looking. A man helped me wrangle Buster away. After about 50 metres Buster decided that he’d rather climb in to a random garden, he wouldn’t come when called and why should he. I rushed to Peri Peri and got Tiff (she’s a DMT there), we searched for the little dog but nothing, I was a little worried inside I have to admit. A man appeared who said he’d look in his garden, after a few minutes he appeared carrying Buster back down to us on the road. Tiff and Buster trotted back up the road happily. Buster is a ball of energy who got me worried. 

Friday has been crap. The power went out in the early hours of the morning and didn’t come back on until just after 4 I think. I just put the kindle on and finshed Life, the Universe and Everything and listened to lots and lots of Morrissey. There might have been a little singing now and then, luckily Tiger is never going to tell on me (at least I don’t think she will). Grace the housekeeper was not feeling well today, im feeling better so I popped in the market and got us a couple of cans of coke and some fruit. When sitting on the porch I noticed a really dark cloud passing, I quickly got the camera and snapped away, there was no rain the cloud passed in the direction of the sea. During the blackout I would quickly go online and see if MOZ or my sisters had e-mailed me but came off soon after to keep the battery as long as possible. Once the power was back of course I could charge it up. I can’t get the TV to work after the power cut will have to look at it. When I was collecting Tank I bumped in to a guy who was saying that we might have problems like this or a total powercut till Sunday, Maputo the Mozambique capital has had no power at all today and its from there that the rest of the country gets its power. The power went again about 6pm ish, guess what I was washing my hair at the time. Yep the lights go out and the hot water in the shower goes cold straight away. So I had to improvise quickly to wash everything out with just my ASDA phone torch lighting the way. It became clear that I better get used to this situation, so I rummaged and found some candles and plunged myself back in to 1970s Britain. I remember the power cuts in the 70s and mum getting out the candles. There is something really quite pretty about a flickering flame lighting the living room. I put on the Kindle and listened to other music and started to doze when at 8.30pm the power came back on. So far its still on, but im not going to count any chickens yet. The moon is so bright tonight, that if I lived outside I wouldn’t need any electric ironic really. I got out the pap lens earlier and snapped some lovely shots, you can really see some nice detail (craters etc) on our nearest solar neighbour, I’m sure if I look hard enough I’ll be able to spot Moonbase Alpha (from the fabulous Space 1999). 

That’s been my uneventful week, let’s hope that next week I have more interesting things to report.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 6. 

This week I have mainly been listening to….. Morrissey, The Bangles (Eternal Flame), Arcade Fire, Suede, Jake Bugg, Skunk Ananise (Weak), The La’s (There she goes), James (sit down),

And have been watching…. Fringe (finished season 1), Breaking Bad (finished season 1), Pompii, Oculus, Top Gear (on BBC Entertainment) 

Saturday, is moving day. It’s started as a shop day, I didn’t really speak to anyone for a while. This gave me a chance to almost finish “The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe”, will finish soon. As I said today is moving day, I am house sitting for Martina and her family while there away for 3 months. Packing was quick as I didn’t bring a huge amount of gear.   A security guard from Casa Barry helped me with my cases, it’s all up hill, I really felt for him ( I had my handful as well; I wasn’t just letting him do all the work….. Honest). After dropping my stuff off at the house, I then went shopping, got pasta, tomatoes, lettuce, onion and garlic. Yes I’m going to cook (I don’t cook, can’t cook). I met Tiger the cat who came strolling in and didn’t seem to bat an eyelid that I was not Martina or family. Tank the dog followed shortly, a beautiful placid dog. I have a TV, so many channels, what’s a girl supposed to do……. (I wonder if I will be able to watch new Doctor Who on BBC Entertainment from 23 August). I did my Mozambique Masterchef audition; it tasted nice (ok it was edible). Tank, Tiger and I were having our first night together, with a cider (I’m drinking the cider not T&T)…   

Sunday was a day in the pool round the back of liquid. Jimmy and I had to demo the skills circuit and be scored do the individual skills. The idea is to show that we can demonstrate the various skills required to student divers, you get scored from 1 to 5, a 3 is a pass but you had to get at least one 5 in water. Some skills are easy and others are not and take a couple (or more attempts), but I got 91 (I think) which is good. Then the main event of the day the stress test. Jimmy and I had to exchange our scuba gear at the bottom of the pool (3 metres) while breathing from one regulator (buddy breathing), we take a couple of breaths and then pass the reg to your buddy to breath. While doing this we are pulling off, unclipping and exchanging and putting on each other’s scuba gear. It takes time, and a certain rhythm to do it correctly. I’m sure Jimmy really could have done without me being his buddy, but all went well. Then we have to do it again, but this time Nadia (our Instructor), surprises us by causing us problems such as pulling of fins, masks, unclipping things and even turning off your air. While she’s messing with us, were trying to adjust what she’s done and continue to exchange our gear while breathing from one regulator. It’s not easy and yes its stressful, I hated it. After I went for my run (saw the pig sleeping) and did some shopping, got marge as I bought potatoes yesterday so will make mash tomorrow. I got a kg of rice for 50mts (about a quid). When I got home Tank and Tiger (T&T) were waiting for me, it was lovely to see them, and I’m enjoying my time I get to spend with my new housemates (Tiger said I snore…… opps). 

Monday, started with tea and toast on the porch with Tiger and Tank, the housekeepers arrived so I thought I should get ready, as I didn’t want to get in the way. Tank walked with me to Peri Peri dive centre, I then carried on making my way to the beach, down a very steep flight of concrete steps. Suddenly Tank runs past me and stop just in front of me wagging her tail. Made me laugh, I took her back up the stairs and left her back at the dive shop. The sky was dark and full of clouds, when it finally rained it totally pissed down and carried on for a couple of hours. This afternoon we went on a local shallow dive, this was to demo search pattern’s (in this case we had to find a deliberately lost a weight belt), we also had to tie a few knots. All went well, im told my compass work was good. Really enjoyed the dive, all the way through you could hear humpbacks singing so loudly, they were really close. The journey back to shore was at high speed, I had a huge smile as I felt really happy after such a lovely dive. Popped in to casa Barry for a drink then home to see T&T. Tiger didn’t appear until after 9.30pm, I kept poking my head out of the door and called “Tiger”. I was getting worried, then eventually she trotted up the stairs and over the gate as if to say “what….. can’t a cat stay out with their friends”. I can relax now that Tiger is home. Oh have started “Life, The Universe and Everything”, the 3^rd Hitchickers book today. 

Tuesday, my day off. Had breakfast with T&T on the porch watching Tofo wake up. After walking Tank to Peri Peri, I went for my run. A lovely morning run even with a slight head wind. Once at the petrol station (where I run too) I got some electric, there is a code on the metre that you write down and hand over as you pay. You then get another code that has to be entered so that you get credit/electric. Later I spent time on the beach and around Tofo taking pictures of daily life.   Once back I really was lazy and had a nap. Spent time on the internet, watched a film and then made evening meal of pasta. I collected Tank who only after a few days together walks right next to me. Tiger didn’t get home until after 7, I had the door open for her so she could slip in (once she did, she made herself comfortable on a pillow next two me on the sofa). The sea has been rough today, it was really windy on the beach earlier. Think it will be the same tomorrow, better remember my sea sickness pill if I’m out diving. 

Wednesday, started with a huge group leaving the dive centre to go kayaking (I heard they had a good time). I spent the morning at the dive shop, with the others. Once the afternoon came I left, went shopping in the market for fruit and veg. It’s funny I have been buying bread rolls for 10mts each, then I heard that other have been getting them for 5mts. So now I make sure I’m charged 5mts a roll, I have the word mug tattooed on my forehead. Got some lovely tomatoes, cucumber, lettuce, potatoes all from the market all quite cheap. Made more pasta and had a nice meal. While watching oculus a dog appeared in the living room, it wasn’t Tank. It was Buster the dog from Peri Peri dive centre; how he got over the garden gate I have no idea. So Tank and I walked Buster back up the road to Peri Peri, it was really funny. This evening I took Tank with me to Mozambeats (a hotel, bar and general chill out place). A lot of the walk was only lit by my ASDA phone; this meant that I had an amazing view of the stars and the Milky Way. Tank walked with me well, and was so well behaved at Mozambeats, there were other dogs there that Tank knows so it was a sort of a doggy do I suppose. I was there because Jimmy, has qualified as a Dive master today, this meant that he had to do what’s known as the snorkel test, basically he had to drink a concoction of alcohol poured through a snorkel, he managed most of it. Then finally he had to do a dive briefing, Sissi drew a map of a reef called Jimmy’s Wreak (it was a man and woman having sex, the map was so funny). Jimmy held it together well and did the briefing like the newly qualified pro that he is. Can’t believe he leaves us Sat, he will be missed a lot at Liquid, it will be really nice to keep in touch with him. Were from different worlds at home but we have the common interest in diving. I wish him all the best in his continued Uni studies. 

Thursday started with a great ocean safari, Mikki and Sissi and I with 5 punters, were out on the ocean for a couple of hours. Had some close humpback action, they weren’t putting on a show like normal, they were just cruising about coming up to surface to breath that’s all, but still spectacular. Later we a pod of dolphins, got in and snorkelled but they didn’t stay about long. I did hear them clicking and squeaking underwater, so beautiful. Then we got buzzed by a couple of Manta’s just under the surface, climbed in and snorkelled watching the Manta sale by under us. The afternoon I was in the pool with Nadia and Joseph who works at Liquid and is learning to dive. I demonstrated a couple if skills that he had to repeat, he’s very good underwater. That evening we were all over at the boss Cindy’s house for a braai or a BBQ at home. Such a beautiful house, we had amazing food. We were there to seeing Jimmy off in style. After a couple of ciders I walked home with Mikki and Sissi, and was greeted by a very excited Tank and Tiger who I had missed that evening (id collected Tank a few hours ago and spent time with her before I went out). 

Friday, woke up to find that there was no water or electric. I sat in the porch with Tank, but breakfast was not the same without tea and toast. This morning’s dive was Jimmy’s final one in Mozambique, we went to a site far out from the shore called Office. The dive was nice; it’s always lovely to dive with people you like who are relaxed in the water. The afternoon dive was a DSD (discover scuba diving), the students were in the pool first, then we took them out to a shallow site. We were buddied up and off we went. I kept my buddy close to me, as you have to remember that they have never used scuba before so you need to watch them all the time. Another nice dive, finished the day at the centre feeling really good. I wanted to do my run, but by the time I got back home it was a little late, will have to go early in the morning (must wake up early) before the ocean safari. 

This week has been another good week in Mozambique. Nothing really happens quickly here, everything/everyone takes there time, Tofo is a chilled out place. After 6 weeks here, I’m feeling really quite relaxed.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique

Week 5.

This week I have mainly been listening to, Beth Orten, Morrissey, PJ Harvey, Lorde and Cocteau Twins, Santigold.

And have been watching…. 50/50, Borat (still makes me laugh like a loon), Looper, Fringe (still season 1) and Event Horizon.

Saturday, was supposed to be one dive, but it became 3, two dives at Salon (15metre) and a deep dive (30metres) later on at Giants Castle. To be honest I’m not very good with the buoy at 30 metres, I had to pass it on to Jimmy (I think towards the middle of the dive), I have problems pulling it at depth. I’m much better with the buoy and reel at shallower 15 or so metre dives. Had a pizza after I closed up, very nice. After my shower ended up in the bar drinking Tipo Tinto (rum that comes in a plastic bottle) and Spar-letta (a raspberry flavour drink made by the coke people, very nice. Finished reading the wonderful “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” this evening, so love that book. Will now move on to the “Restaurant at the End of the Universe”, don’t know how many times I have read the 5 books that make up the trilogy. Today I lost my dive socks, I had them this morning then they disappeared (probably down some unsuspecting time and space wormhole that must have opened up) however like any good intergalactic Hitchhiker I always know where my towel is.

Sunday, I covered shop for a bit, I did some sign writing with chalk. I’m arty but not a sign writer, so when I was asked to write on the huge blackboard I really didn’t know what to do. Anyway it worked out ok it seemed to go down well. The shop was quite busy today with a double tank in the morning and a couple of free diving sessions. This gave me time to pull all the fins and put them back in (a sort) of order, from small to large. Have been invited to a BBQ tonight at the lovely Kris (one of the instructors) place. Not sure where it really is so will stumble about with my torch on my ASDA phone, fingers crossed.

I’m back from Kris BBQ, found the place ok. I had a vague idea where to go, when I spotted Nadia’s quad bike under a tree I knew I was in the right area, a quick phone call confirmed it. Lovely food, great company, really nice time. Jimmy lent me his manly torch to go home with. Looking up the stars were shining brightly, there is a little light pollution here from the few street lights and other lighting. But otherwise the night sky is beautifully clear and on view.

Monday, my day off. I didn’t really lay in that much, I was out running by 8.30ish, much better run then last Fridays. I saw the Pig being taken for a walk in its field, looked very sweet. When I got back I changed and had a dip in the sea, I didn’t get harpooned by the local fishermen thinking a whale had beached itself. At 3pm I net up with Lawrence who works at Casa barry, we went to the local town Inhambane. To get there we took a chapa, a small mini bus that far too many people squeeze on to. Ours was packed, so packed we were pulled over by the police (not seen the police in cars/vans over here before). I was told that they took his licence away, we were there for what felt like ages, a number of the passengers were getting loudly vocal about the delay. We carried on only ot find the police a little later, at a stall buying Coke (the drink, not the powder). Our driver approached them and was taken out of view by an officer. It was mentioned to me that maybe he has had to pay a bribe. I don’t know if he got his licence back but it took a lot longer to travel 23km than it should. Tofo and Inhambane had no electric today from about 2am to 5pm, so a number of shops and cafes were closed as they couldn’t keep things cold. It’s a small town, not a huge or overly busy place, watched the ferries that you can take the short ride to Maxixe (a lot of visitors go there to sort out visa). I will go to Inhambane earlier next time so I can go on the ferry and do other things. Had a nice drink while waiting for the cab home, the Italian owner (Fabrizio) turned out to be a Smiths and Morrissey fan, we chatted about our mutual love for “the pop of mope” , will visit there again.

Tuesday has been a wet day, not from rain Ive been in the water for most of it. Assisted Nadia with a scuba review, this is for someone who can scuba dive but hasn’t for a while, this was in the pool. After I went on an Ocean safari, plenty of humpbacks some quite close to us. A Manta did pass us but we didn’t find it again. No whale shark or dolphins today, some nice snorkelling at the end of the safari. After this I went on a dive to a local site, the viz was 3 to 5metres not good, a silty bottom, I was buoy and reel duty for most of it. Had to be careful as there was another group of divers at the site, Frieda (from Peri Peri) swam over to wave “hi” at me. As I was at the back sweeping keeping an eye on our group I didn’t really seen any of the exciting life the others saw. I didn’t see the squid (no not on a plate….though yes I have eaten Calamari), Squid, Octopus, Cuttlefish, Nautilus, and Sea Cucumbers are huge faves of mine. Once on dry land I met the 2 new DMTs that have joined us. I still haven’t found my dive socks I lost Saturday, but in my case yesterday I found I’d brought an old holey pair so am using them now, as without I’ll get blisters from the fins rubbing my feet. I had a meal of Rice and Beef in a market café for 60mts, really nice, so have added that to my list of cheap places to eat in ToFo. Don’t the places name it’s behind the fruit and veg stalls in the market.

Wednesday was shop day for me. It was very busy at the dive shop, a dive in the morning (they had mantas) and a full boat on the ocean safari (they had an awesome whaleshark snorkel). So the shop was full of people needing to be kitted up. I also started to do an inventory of all the equipment, as asked for by the manager. Because the shop was so busy, I had my work cut out trying to keep things like the fins and wetsuits in the order there supposed to be in. I helped Nadia do a DSD (Discover scuba Diving), its really fun to watch people smile after they have breathed underwater for the first time. Today was the pool session, tomorrow they will be in the sea. We had a brief kitten moment today, a small kitten maybe the same age, deffo same colouring as Swayze appeared where the dive boats are stored (there pulled on a trailer by a tractor to the beach). This kitten was caught and put in a box, poor thing was terrified. Leo and I put it round the back in a quiet place. I got some milk from the market and put in a small cup. We went back but the kitten hadn’t drank any and hissed at me when I tried to approach. A few hours later we were told that the mother had been spotted near the boats. So Leo and I returned the kitten to the location and left it there, we went and checked on it a few times and mum had found it. I will check again in the morning and hopefully mum will has moved the kitten, fingers crossed. Mikki and Sissi returned today after being away 2 weeks, so good to see them. This evening I went to Leos with everyone else for food and drink and

Thursday was dive day….woo hoo. Two lovely dives, the first was a deep at 30metres, a 1.8 to 2 metre Marble Ray visited the reef, I was only metres from it. Such a beautiful creature, its wing tips rippling, feeling the coral as it sailed by. It didn’t mind us being there as it came round for a second pass. During our safety stop (5 metres for 3 mins) we had maybe 50 Devil rays passing 10 metres or a little more underneath us. We were neutrally buoyant in the ocean hanging there watching them underneath us. The second dive was the continuation of the DSD from Yesterday, taking the people new to diving in to shallow water 10 metres and assisting them. The really loved it, I was high fived under water by the two younger people. Such a cool dive, great to see people really enjoy themselves. Enjoyed my run, a few small children ran with me for a little which was sweet, the sun was low in the sky and shined directly in to my eyes going to the petrol station making it tough to see. The pig was there, all looked good in pigland. Had a few drinks in the bar with the owner of Casa Barry.

Friday, hung over’ head felt wholly, I didn’t really feel that a double deep dive would be a good idea, there were loads of DMT’s around so I was allowed to go back home. I had a nice breakfast, and then went with Martina to her house. I’m moving in there tomorrow, as she is going away for 3 months so I’m house sitting. Also looking after their dog “Tank” and Cat “Tiger”, can’t wait will be so nice. Met the 2 lovely ladies that do housework, I’m looking forward to my new temp home. Other than that have napped and not done mush, watched a heap of fringe episodes trying to finish season 1. I spend a lot of time on my own, which is not different to when I was back home. I’m not a person that enjoys huge groups of people, I feel awkward at parties and do’s (I usually end up on my own in a corner anyway), so I find it better to just not go and do my own thing. It’s not a good solution but I think in the long run it’s what best.

Pic’s, me striking a pose, Cardito and Enock, treated myself to breakfast this morning, Tofo beach in the morning, Cardito and I a few days ago, my chalk sign writing at Liquid.

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique

Week 4.

This week I have mainly been listening to, PJ Harvey, Morrissey, Goldfrapp, Oasis, the XX, Ladyhawk (while running).

Am have been watching…. Limitless, Hansel and Gretal Witch hunters, more season 1 Fringe (im up to ep 15 I think), Almost Human ep 6 and 7, Cuban Heels and Robocop (2014).

Saturday, the start of the week, was a shop day (were short on staff due to illness), it meant I got to feed and wee (and poo) dive shop kitty Swayze and have her snuggle up to me most of the day, I do love to stroke a pussy (snigger). Oh, at 6.30 this morning while making my way to the dive shop I met a kid, no more the 10 or 11, already waiting to sell coconut bread rolls. I bought a bag, as a kid should be in bed at that time not prowling the beach selling bread. I got my internet dongle working today, hooray…. I have internet when I want it. It appears that everything is pay as you go here. I have loaded it with megabites, let’s see how long it lasts. Beautiful full moon tonight, took the camera out to the beach to snap some shots. Had a meal in a street café called bamboo , rice and fish, I don’t know what the fish was but it was tasty, I didn’t eat the head. On the TV was what appeared to be either Mozambique’s Got Talent or there version of the X-Factor, one bloke sang a Coldplay song in Portuguese while a woman randomly danced in the background (reminded me of Howard Jones in the 80s who had a dancer in chains randomly next to him), I didn’t take notice who won, sorry.

Sunday, was a partial day off, I covered dive centre in morning looking after Swayze, when everyone came back I pootled off and did my own thing. I had a lazy Sunday it was very hot, so I slept and watched a film. Went to the beach and spent time with Martina and family. In the evening I met Martina for a meal, went to a nice place called “What u want”, I had half a chicken and chips….. (so tasty). I arrived early so walked around Tofo for a bit (there’s not much to walk around) and then sat on a wall near the restaurant, as I didn’t want to go in on my own. Kate who works there, who I have met a couple of times came over partly coz she thought I was someone else, but also coz I looked a little lost. She made going in on my own so much easier, any way Martina arrived minutes later. Had a lovely evening in down town Tofo, just escaped as the dreaded football started? Oh I dropped my cheap stupid torch, the front lens and the bulb came out, fell in between wooden slatted floor, will look in the morning.

Monday started with me looking for the lost bits of my torch, I found the lens (plastic) and the reflective thingy (a kind woman who works at the place im staying helped me fish them out from between the wooden flooring). But the actual bulb was not found; luckily I have a torch on my cheap ASDA phone. Double tank dive, the sea was so flat going out to the first dive site. I had ear problems going down; by the time I equalised and got to depth everyone had buggered off. So I looked around and dually did the lost diver thing of come up slowly without a safety stop, all the time ascending I was looking for signs of divers or bubbles, didn’t see them. The second dive was more successful, lovely site called “Office” 3 large potato groupers leaving near each other (one snapped at another fish who got two close), couple of large morays (love a Morey). On our safety stop circling below us were a couple of Devil rays. Once on the surface the conditions had changed, it was dark, windy and raining. As we travelled back to land at speed the rain felt like bullets on your face. Later on I went for my run, and yes I saw the Pig. There are a couple of Goats that are trying to make themselves as interesting as the pig, but it’s not going to work they can bleat (do Goats bleat) as much as they like.  

Tuesday, started with a rainbow over Tofo, so beautiful. The day ended in tears, Swayze (dive shop kitty) was killed by two dogs during lunch time. I’d spent the morning with her snuggled up to me, sleeping in my arms, I feed her and played with her, had a lovely time. I took some nice pictures of her and me. Once the mornings dive had came back I went to lunch, I had pizza and had to wait for what seemed ages (they were so busy). I get back to find she’s been attacked and died. Swayze just lay there looking like she was awake, still alive, she was still warm (it was heart breaking, I just cried). A few of us thought there was a heartbeat but there wasn’t. What had happened was a man had come and he had 2 large dogs in the car, they got out and came over and sniffed Swayze who’s nest (a plastic washing up bowl) had been moved to the floor as she kept getting out, people didn’t want her to fall off the counter. I’m told that the dogs sniffed her then just attacked, Jimmy and others pulled the dogs apart but the damage was done. She’s been buried in the back garden of Liquid Adventure. Such a lovely little kitty, so innocent who gave so much pleasure to all at Liquid and the people who passed through. I really feel so upset, even though she was not mine, I spent so much time with her I really loved that kitten, she really had stolen my heart. A black Tuesday here in Tofo.

Wednesday, was tough i’m not going to pretend it wasn’t, I went and said hello to Swayze (grave), I cant help it I care that’s all. Any way I went on ocean Safari, saw humpbacks and dolphins, punters get in the water (not with Humpbacks) and snorkel, I got in with them just to keep an eye on them. The water was beautiful really warm, the dolphins though didn’t want to play, they have far better things on their minds (certinally according to the Hitchicker’s guide to the galaxy, anyway). Had a good couple of hours on the boat, it was full of people. My first time travelling right at the front with the captain, woo hoo. Other than that I did my run……. PIGWATCH….PIGWATCH…. I saw my pig while coming back from the petrol station, didn’t see him/her going was a little worried at first. But I can confirm that piggy has been spotted… this ends PIGWATCH….. There are a few cows that are now trying to get attention, like the previously mentioned Goats, it’s not going to work. Oh saw Kelvin the policeman and he said he is going to come visit me soon, I said Iusually went to bed early to try and put him off. Maybe friends in a position of power is not such a good thing after all. I ate again in bamboo the local restaurant, having rice and fish (again) for 50mts (just under a pound), huge plate of rice and nondescript fish (didn’t have a head like last Saturday). Really tasty and filling, I’m trying to eat cheaply, as I’m not making any money so am living off the money that I save before I left.

Thursday, this morning I used nail varnish to write on a brick at Swayzes grave, I felt it was important that it was marked properly. Turns out I’m not the only person that has visited her everyday so far. I think of her a lot, which upsets me. I took part in my first DSD (discover scuba diving), a person completely new to diving has a taster. The instructor (the lovely Kris) explains and demonstrates the equipment and skills that will be repeated in the pool. Once in the pool, I just observe, but helped with the “out of air” skill. Sat we take the punter out on a shallow dive to try the skills in the ocean, in a real dive environment. Earlier today Jimmy and I went over a few of the self-assessments with Nadia (our main instructor) from the DM book, which also went well. Oh today I got confirmation I’m a rescue diver, that’s one step towards being a DM. I ate again in bamboo, had rice and fish for 60mts, todays fish had head and eyes, I didn’t really eat the head. The rice was lovely really a filling meal must get a pic of the place. Tonight it’s blowing a storm, sand was blowing in to my eyes while walking through the market and across the beach with my little light from my cheap phone. While flicking through TV channels in the bar (it was empty) I found Angolan TV, showing their version of Big Brother, I didn’t watch any of it. I also found BBC entertainment from South Africa, Watch a little it felt like I was really at home.

Friday in Tofo was a slow start, not a lot to do in the morning. It’s been windy and the sea looked rough, there were a few kite surfers taking advantage of the wind and waves today. Had some nice coconut this morning, forcing it out first with a bit of coconut shell, then I went up market and used a spoon.    This afternoon Jimmy and I had to demonstrate various skills to Nadia in the pool. You are showing that you can demonstrate the skills to others; it’s not showing that you know how to do them (which of course you do). So everything is a little exaggerated, with your hand you motion the breathing in and out of the regulator as you do the skill that sort of thing. You’re sort of presenting the skill in a way I suppose. Sunday we’ll get scored, 3 is a pass per skill but you need to get a 5 on at least one of them (finger crossed). My least favourite one is the mask flooding/taking off and replacing at depth. When I did the maskless swim earlier I really couldn’t see anything, I was just looking for dark shapes that were jimmy and Nadia so I knew I was in the right direction (sort off). Had a shit run this eve, I don’t know if it’s due to being tired or not eating much, or of course having been in the pool for a while doing the skills. But getting to the petrol station was fine, but coming back was a struggle and I admit I walked up a few hills. But I can report I saw the pig, that’s the main news today. I wish I had a camera on the run (will have to take the gopro) as I see some great sites when out and about. Had Chicken (actually one drumstick) and rice in bamboo for 50mts, huge plate of rice again can’t really complain I suppose. Might treat myself to some more expensive food this weekend, give bamboo a rest for a few days, don’t want them getting sick of me now.

I left the UK a month ago tomorrow (Saturday), in same ways its gone quick, in others it hasn’t. I have to admit I feel very much at home here. Yes I miss Spike (the cat), MOZ and of course my nephews and niece (yes, especially Anaia as I used to see her more often) I hope that the little ones remember there aunty. This week though has been sad due to the loss of Swayze (maybe she was a little like a Spike replacement, I don’t know) But she won’t be forgotten. That’s it for this week…..

`             

Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique

Week 3.

This week I have mainly been listening to Suede, Shed Seven, Arcade Fire and PJ Harvey.

And have been watching Fringe from start of Season 1, World War Z, Ender Game, Snow White and the huntsman (which is very slow, gets better when the dwarfs arrive), Moon (love it more each time I see it), Tron (which has not aged well)

Saturday was supposed to be shop day for me, I opened up at 7am and waited. The first dive was not until 11ish; when one of the other DMT’s arrived and decided they didn’t want to dive, I took their place. It was a double tank (that is not what Jacques Cousteau used to have on his back, 2 tanks) which is 2 dives one after another with a short surface interval on the boat not returning to shore. Going to the first location we were buzzed by a Whaleshark, I got in and snorkelled got some reasonable footage (not as good as last year), then almost immediately a manta went past up. We also had some humpback action on the surface 3 together, pretty awesome site.

The dives were lovely, today was the first time I have bombed to the surface with the buoy line, and then carried the buoy line for the duration of the dive (the buoy floats on the surface so the skipper of the boat knows roughly where we are). At depth we saw a couple of Manta’s sail past us. The second dive I saw a Manta on my own as everyone else had gone through a coral arch. I’m claiming that Manta for myself. We were buzzed again as we were heading home, I shoved my camera in the water and have some nice footage, again I don’t think BBC Natural History Unit will be calling me.

Sunday, a day off, it’s been a very hot winter’s day here, but the weather is on the turn. Just been on the beach with Martina and Kien and you could see the storm clouds rolling towards us from in land. Diving might get rough over the next few days. I’m not a beach bunny, more like a beached whale….lol, sitting on the beach is not something I’d do on my own but with others its really nice. ). This morning went for my run first thing (get it out of the way once at the petrol station I treated myself to a Snickers (emmm… sooo tasty) After a little nap I went out taking pictures, it was the hottest time of the time of the day, I was glad to get in to shade. Oh when I was out and about I got chatting to group of policemen outside the police station (you only ever really see them crowded around the station or maybe near the beach, not sure If there is much crime in Tofo), they were asking where I’m from that sort of thing, where ‘im staying and my name. Then one of them said I’ll come and visit you…….. I didn’t know what to say, I just smiled and said I had to go. Let’s hope I don’t get a visit from the rozzers.

Monday, and no one told me we were opening slightly later, so I sat there and read my dive master book. Another double dive today only about 14 metres, I bombed to the bottom with the line and held it throughout, there was a little current during the second dive which meant I had to fight with it slightly. Good dives relatively near shore saw plenty of puffer fish and lion fish also saw a goat fish. Coming home the boat speeds on to the shore, the skipper beaches the boat, so everyone holds on tight and waits for the violent jolt. The first couple of times you want to close your eyes and hope that we do stop and don’t just plough up the beach and in to the market. After many of these landing I can say its sort of fun watching the boat your on aim for the beach and just keep going.

I know 2 people that have had malaria in the last week.

Tuesday, one day and a personal favourite spotted, an octopus under in a crack, later Mikki spotted another, so 2 octopuses in one dive, woo hoo. We spotted a couple of turtles as well, the first one we were a little worried that it might have been caught by fishing line, as it wasn’t really moving much, but Kris our instructor had a close look and all was fine it was really just chilling on the reef. It’s been an overcast and chilly day; it rained for a couple of hours this afternoon.   I had a chicken curry at a local place (I walked there in the rain, with my towel wrapped around me as I didn’t have a jumper), could have had more chicken really but very nice. Then within an hour and a half I was running, possibly should have left it longer until the exercise. My I-pod also died, so I broke two running rules today. Rule 1 don’t run on a chicken curry stomach and rule 2 make sure your I-pod is fully charged. Oh PIGWATCH, I have seen my pig twice recently on Sunday and today, as far as I can tell it’s the same one, problem is I don’t speak Portuguese and I don’t speak pig, but it’s a pig and it’s black so I feel it’s the same pig. Chatted to Kelvin my policeman friend again and Robb his colleague, they wanted me to buy them food. They work 24 hr shift then have 2 days off, no wonder they all look so tired and fed up.

Wednesday, felt like I was back at home, it was dull and overcast and raining, in fact it rained a lot and I got caught in it a few times. I was actually glad I brought my denim jacket and waterproof army trousers that Janna recently gave me as present when I visited Finland. I had to change back in to shorts soon after as I was too hot again. Another double tank, the sea was rough the wind was strong and it rained so the surface interval (between) dives was not fun. The first dive was beautiful a place called Sherwood Forest (I didn’t see any merry men) the vis was maybe 25 metres, saw a couple of large loggerhead turtles just chilling at 30.5 metres, the singing from the humpback was so load your body vibrated. The second dive at Salon had a vis of maybe 5 metres, still enjoyed but not as good.

I made friends today with a dog called chicken, who i shared a little of my lovely T-Bone with. There’s a lovely man in the market who can’t speak, I found out his name is Nelson. Today while trying to converse, I hope I haven’t agreed to get married, lol. I think he’s going to show me a cheap place to eat for about 70 mets, that’s what I think we were talking about. If I have accidently agreed to get married, then your all welcome, lol.

Thursday, was shop day for me. The morning it rained and rained and guess what, it rained more. I was babysitting dive shop kitty, she’s feeding well but not pooing and peeing, couldn’t get her to do one all day a little worrying. Ploughed through my DM manual to keep me busy, finished the day on the last chapter 9. Tomoz am diving so should be more exciting.

Oh I have paid 1300mts for a dongle so I can access the net, fingers crossed it arrives tomoz and it works.

Friday, got up and went for my run straight away, didn’t see the Pig. Today another double dive, first went to Sherwood Forest again (see weds)but the vis was terrible, such a difference to couple of days ago. Did see a huge Potato Grouper through, do love them they are so inquisitive.   The other dive didn’t have good vis either. On a plus side it didn’t rain during the surface interval, woo hoo. Dive shop Kitty is a little constipated (poor love), she’s not pooing, hope she’s going to be ok, everyone is a little concerned I think. The owners of the dive company have arrived and seem very nice, so meeting new people today and remembering that there top dog. I have my internet dongle now, but won’t work till tomorrow (Boo hiss), this will make contact a lot easier.

I must get pics of the Goat man, well I call him that. He walks maybe 10 or more Goats through town every morning, it’s a nice sight, I suspect that there not pets L. Coming to the end of my 3rd weeks here and all good, having a great time. I get a little lonely at night, but I watch films and TV MOZ downloaded for me.

That’s it for now folks, more soon.

D xxxx