Misfits Mid Life Crisis Adventures in ………….. Mozambique 

Week 7. 

This week I have mainly been listening to….. (watching on) VH1, Duran Duran (The Reflex), Vanessa Paradis (Joe Le Taxi), The Pet Shop Boys & Dusty Springfield (What Have I Done To Deserve This), Blondie (The Tide is High). Arcade Fire, The Divine Comedy, Lana Del Ray, Shed Seven, Morrissey, Radiohead.

And have been watching…. Pacific Rim, Breaking bad (season 2), Man of Steel, X-Men First Class, Thor : The Dark World, I Frankenstein, Little Miss Sunshine, lots of Top Gear (Season 8/9, on BBC Entertainment), The Great British Bake Off (season 4, on BBC Lifestyle).

I went to bed early last night, as I wanted to get up at 5.45am Saturday so I could go running. And I did the only people I saw on the road were people walking or cycling to work. Other than the sound of my plates of meat pounding the tarmac, the only other real noise were the cockerels waking everybody else up. Now and then there was what appeared to be mist drifting across the road, it wasn’t mist. I think this was from people baking bread, I say that as I saw a couple of woman carrying huge empty metal trays that could hold a lot of bread/rolls. As I ran back home, the sun was rising over Tofo a beautiful site. Oh must mention that the pig was spotted sleeping in its field, yes I always slow down to have a look out for it (that’s PIGWATCH over with). There was no electric this morning, but I had water so had a very quick shower (quick as I didn’t know if and when the water might run out). Today was Jimmy’s last day, he popped in and said goodbyes, he will be missed at Liquid. I then went off with Mikki and Sissi on an Ocean Safari. Plenty of humpback on the surface, we saw humpback dolphins and ordinary dolphins. Got in the water to snorkel near the Dolphins which is always fun. A nice safari, enjoyable way to start a day. The rest of the day I was on shop duty, there were a lot of people surfing and having lessons to surf. I’ve never done it so must arrange a lesson with Manni sometime. At the end of the day while stocking up on Savanna (cider) and Coke (a cola) I was told that there is another safari tomorrow and I can lead. I’ve never lead and never done a briefing, at this time I’m a little nervous fingers crossed it goes well. I better start practising…. 

Sunday was so good; it really is im not sure how it can be topped. I woke up with Tiger sleeping on the end of my pillow and against my head, how comfy were we it was a pity I had to get up. I lead the ocean safari this morning, I did the briefing and it appears to have gone well, I practiced a few times to myself and then to Sissi. The actual safari was so much fun, there was so much humpback action on the surface, we had breaching (jumping out of the water) whales 20 or less metres from us, and lots of fin slapping. It was a great safari, we had bottlenose and humpback dolphins, we got in but they didn’t want to play (which is fine), just seeing them is amazing. The afternoon I was on a mapping dive, Mikki and I have to map a reef, we were at a shallow site (as there was an open water dive going on at the same time), Mikki and I decided what system to use and how we were going to do the map. The mapping went really well, I was counting kick cycles (this determines distance travelled) while Mikki was near me drawing what he saw. We haven’t finished yet, got more to do tomorrow. But am pleased about what we have done so far. The humpback singing was so load, the captain of our boat said they were 50 or so metres away. Came home had a nice meal, now with my flatmates T&T. When I have had such a good day I worry that being happy is going to end in deserter, I think that’s why I have spent so much of my life trying not to be overly happy. I always worry that something terrible is going to happen and bring me crashing down to the ground in a pile of ashes. 

I slept so badly and felt really ill. Monday was crap. Everything ached, head hurts, I felt like death warmed up, See I knew I shouldn’t have felt so good about the great things that happened yesterday. I really felt unwell, got some advice and went and saw the Nurse/Doctor at Peri Peri divers, English wasn’t his first language and Portuguese not mine, so some interpreting had to take place from other dive shop staff. I had a Malaria test, a pin prick of blood is dropped on to a little plastic slide. The kind of thing you see in CSI, its like a small pregnancy tester. There is a little white window that slowly turned red (I assume its soaking up the blood). Once the window had turned red it then changes white leaving a thin red line. From this the Dr can tell that I didn’t have Malaria. I don’t have Malaria, but he gave me 3 lots of pills, to be taken 3 times a day (they were a slightly odd amount of pills that will last till Thursday morning only). I went to the market with Tank and got water, after this we walked and paddled on the beach. Then made myself comfy at home with T & T. 

I slept badly again, woke up at 4am and put TV on, watched an ep of QI and then part 1 of the River Nile Top Gear Africa special, so funny really is. I managed to sleep a few hours but not much more. Tuesday I still don’t feel well, still achy and just feeling like a bag of poo hanging from a stick. I went to the market with Tank and stocked up on supplies, we again went on the beach and had a paddle, to be honest Tank didn’t look that impressed really at the lovely feeling of the sea and sand on your feet. Came home put the TV on and part 2 of the River Nile Top gear special was just coming on, perfect. I just love watching Top Gear, it makes me laugh like a loon, whenever a new series comes on at home I get a little over excited. Here there on BBC Knowledge and Entertainment, even though I have seen the episodes before they seem even funnier here in Mozambique. 

Wednesday, really nothing happened due to not feeling great. I hoped that Tank might walk with Grace the housekeeper to Peri Peri, no she wouldn’t go. Which is sweet really, so Tank and I went up the hill together. In fact when I picked her up later in the day she really appeared to be pleased to see me, the love from a puppy is really special. I think today must be Top Gear day, I say this because there have been so many episodes on BBC Knowledge and Entertainment and yes I watched them all before but the law states that “you shall watch Top Gear, all the time”, I’m sure it’s the law (must consult a lawyer about that…). That’s it for today, I have nothing to say, I think you can guess that. 

I had another terrible night, I can tell you there were 3 power cuts between 1am and 3am, that’s how interesting my night was. After taking Tank to Peri Peri, I ended up on the sofa with Tiger for a few hours. At lunchtime I went out to take some pictures on the porch as I don’t have any interesting Tofo people or places pics (coz I haven’t been anywhere). I got out the pap lens and tried to snap birds, emmmmm………. none of the pics when I looked later were useable they were all so washed out that you really couldn’t work anything out. I need to experiment with settings. I’ve only really used the lens at night to take pics of the moon so far. What have I done today, ive watched more Top Gear, and not a lot else. I picked up Tank we walked home with Buster (a Fred Bassett looking) dog. I then attempted to take Buster back home to Peri Peri, but he had other idea’s. First he went to visit some other puppies who certainly make a lot of noise and are quite scary looking. A man helped me wrangle Buster away. After about 50 metres Buster decided that he’d rather climb in to a random garden, he wouldn’t come when called and why should he. I rushed to Peri Peri and got Tiff (she’s a DMT there), we searched for the little dog but nothing, I was a little worried inside I have to admit. A man appeared who said he’d look in his garden, after a few minutes he appeared carrying Buster back down to us on the road. Tiff and Buster trotted back up the road happily. Buster is a ball of energy who got me worried. 

Friday has been crap. The power went out in the early hours of the morning and didn’t come back on until just after 4 I think. I just put the kindle on and finshed Life, the Universe and Everything and listened to lots and lots of Morrissey. There might have been a little singing now and then, luckily Tiger is never going to tell on me (at least I don’t think she will). Grace the housekeeper was not feeling well today, im feeling better so I popped in the market and got us a couple of cans of coke and some fruit. When sitting on the porch I noticed a really dark cloud passing, I quickly got the camera and snapped away, there was no rain the cloud passed in the direction of the sea. During the blackout I would quickly go online and see if MOZ or my sisters had e-mailed me but came off soon after to keep the battery as long as possible. Once the power was back of course I could charge it up. I can’t get the TV to work after the power cut will have to look at it. When I was collecting Tank I bumped in to a guy who was saying that we might have problems like this or a total powercut till Sunday, Maputo the Mozambique capital has had no power at all today and its from there that the rest of the country gets its power. The power went again about 6pm ish, guess what I was washing my hair at the time. Yep the lights go out and the hot water in the shower goes cold straight away. So I had to improvise quickly to wash everything out with just my ASDA phone torch lighting the way. It became clear that I better get used to this situation, so I rummaged and found some candles and plunged myself back in to 1970s Britain. I remember the power cuts in the 70s and mum getting out the candles. There is something really quite pretty about a flickering flame lighting the living room. I put on the Kindle and listened to other music and started to doze when at 8.30pm the power came back on. So far its still on, but im not going to count any chickens yet. The moon is so bright tonight, that if I lived outside I wouldn’t need any electric ironic really. I got out the pap lens earlier and snapped some lovely shots, you can really see some nice detail (craters etc) on our nearest solar neighbour, I’m sure if I look hard enough I’ll be able to spot Moonbase Alpha (from the fabulous Space 1999). 

That’s been my uneventful week, let’s hope that next week I have more interesting things to report.