Misfits Mid-Life Crisis……..

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique & Nels (SA) (The NEXT Chapter). THE VISA RUN SPECIAL EDITION……

Week 82, Friday 8^th January until Friday 15^th January 2016.

Portuguese word of the week: “Mal Humorado”,means Grumpy, my natural state most of the Visa Run.

Friday, its visa run time, there is so much to say but not enough space to write it all.  Patrick and I had been told about a bus from Maxixe to Maputo. Getting to Maxixe was easy with a lift from Mike Moye to Inhambane then the ferry (a small boat crammed full of people) to Maxixe..  We were told the PostBus left between 11to noon.  It didn’t arrive until 12.45 and left about 13.00, if we had known that we’d have stayed in the air conditioned KFC a lot longer instead of sitting in the shade near the loos behind the PostBus shop, this was the start of me being just grumpy for 48 hours.  The bus arrived and sure enough it’s a large coach.  It did have A/C but the windows were open so it was pointless.  The seats were comfortable which was a good thing; however a huge down side was the Chinese Movies being played VERY loudly.  I am sure that no one understood Chinese or could read the very small English subtitles.  Due to the fact we were so late we arranged a cab, yes a cab from Nels in SA to pick us up in Maputo only to take us to Nels.  Once in Maptuo we had to find the cab as he was lost, Patrick and I ended up walking to meet it as it was too complicated to explain how to get to us. The border was a doodle and we reached the hotel at 00.30, such a long day.

A sole Finn in Maxixe.

Chinese moves were so loud.

Saturday cinema day.  Star Wars ended last Thursday this was what we were told when we arrived, yep I was still grumpy.  We ended up seeing three good films (my star reviews are at the bottom of the blog). Even “CUM” books didn’t make me laugh today my world was broken. The” Tofo Doctor Who club” watched a couple of episodes to finish off the 2015 season this eased the pain a little.

Tofo Doctor Who club on tour.

Kiitos Finnsh TV.

Sunday a epic day, the day I was on a mission.  I booked my ticket out of town on the Greyhound bus (I went business class), the PostBus really could learn a thing or two.  Said goodbye to Patrick who is returning to Finland, he has become a great mate over the last 8 weeks. Once on the Greyhound I discovered id left or lost my headphone, the bus makes a 10 minute stop, I rushed off.  Due to being Sunday most shops were closed but I found an electrical shop that sold odds and ends and bought a new pair of headphones, phew.  Once I crossed the border and changed my SIM over the battery died, there was charge but I couldn’t get it to activate and the spare was in Tofo.  Once in Maputo I had a downloaded map of the city and the rough whereabouts of the Cinemas.  I walked with the help of a nice man telling me I was about to enter the red light district and to be careful.  There was no cinema, but I found a theatre with a huge queue outside.  I came across the next cinema but it looked like it had closed years ago. I then hailed the first of 3 cabs.  I directed the driver to another cinema, but upon arrival found that this had closed as well.  A couple of joggers must have seen my bemused look and started to chat, this is when I discovered that the theatre I was at earlier is very near a shopping centre with a cinema.  Quickly I hailed another cab, a strange man got in as well saying we’ll go together I had to explain to the driver I had no idea who he was, the driver promptly chased him away.  We drove to the Maputo Shopping Centre the first thing I saw was a Star wars poster.  This is when the 8 year old in me took over. I got my ticket and waited an hour, I did sneak in to the screen as the door were open and there on the BIG screen were “Han and Leia” .  When it was my time I took my traditional seat middle of the front row and sat there with the biggest smile on my face for just over 2 hours.  The grumpiness had finally disappeared.

Monday, got on the fatties bus about 5am, I had thought about which side of the bus would be in more shade, I got it wrong, note to self “sit on the left hand side”. After a couple of hours of waiting, being asked if I wanted to buy biscuits, bread, fruit, sunglasses, underwear (both sexes), children’s toys, Phones, lights, earrings in fact everything, we left Maputo.. The journey was slow and uncomfortable, but and arrived in Tofo at 16.30. I’m living at Nadia’s house for a few week’s, this means I have Rusty as a housemate again.

I give this 3 stars.

I give this 4 stars

Back to 3 stars for this met

Tuesday, a day off (thank you Satu my boss) to recover from the weekend.  I took Rusty out for a very long walk on the beach, eventually ending up at Liquid.  Rusty is very protective of his home (righty so) so on a Tuesday he is kept occupied so the housekeeper can do her job. Wednesday: went on the shortest double tank ever.  Gleen who I met in Maputo and travelled in the cattle bus with came to dive.  Normally a double tank is one dive then a long surface interval before the second dive.  Today both dives were in the bay and minutes from the shore.  “Clownfish” never disappoints and with 20 plus metres viz it was amazing.  Then back on the boat to change tanks and travel a few minutes to “Salon” once again stunning viz.  Mike wanted to make it to “Fingers”, we didn’t get that far but we were surprised by a Blotch tail fan ray next to a bommie.

Thursday: lead another dive to “salon” the viz was the same as yesterday makes me wonder what our deep sites are like at the mo.  The new Finnish family have arrived there opening a café at Liquid, I have been chatting with karlo, he’s a Star Wars fan, an artist and a tattooist.  I think there is a line behind me for new tattoos (he has his gear).  Looking at his art makes me realis how much of a pretender I am.  I spent the afternoon freshening up the wall map at the shop.

Friday, it rained really hard, so much so that a man opposite the dive centre dug a small dam out of mud to stop his property flooding.  A group of orphans from Inhambane were coming to Tofo, I took the bosses kids to meet them.  Due to the rain and the children being offered last minute horse riding we never saw them.  But Liquid made a clothes donation, hope they all go to good homes.

 Our final pic.

In other news.  Found out the distance between Russia and USA in the Bering straits.  Eaten a lot of Bread Shack rolls, on Friday we ordered 3 and got 6 will have to go there tomorrow to sort out bill.  My toes that I dropped a dive weight on in October are a little swollen, they hurt or ach most days.  I am 13% fluent in German, to say things I have to imagine the works, I’ll never actually be able to actually have a conversation with anyone. I have lost my new shorts I bought in SA, and Rusty has enjoyed a new vest top I got from SA as well.  

This week I have been watching: “Star Wars: The Force Awakens”, (2015) ******, “The Good Dinosaur”, (2015) *****, “The Last Witch Hunter”, (2015) ***, “Secret In There Eyes”, (2015) ***, “Concussion”, (2015) ***, “Doctor Who: Hell Bent”, (Season 9/36 eps 12), “Doctor Who: The Husband of River Song”, (2015 Crimbo special), “The Matrix”, (1999). 

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (08 & 09/01/16) “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (13/01/16),  “David Bowie” (R.I.P) “Morrissey”, “The Cure”, “Pulp”,

Reading: “The Hitchhickers Guide To the Galaxy”, by Douglas Adams, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 81, Saturday 2^nd January until Thursday 7^th January 2016.

Portuguese word of the week: “Deixando”, meaning “Leaving” as in everyone is leaving Tofo. 

Saturday, I suspect I’m one of the few people in Tofo who doesn’t have a hangover this morning.  Went on a dive south with an American family great viz at “Manta” but no Manta’s seen.  Later I led a dive to “Salon” the viz was so much better than a few days ago I could actually see the reef.  There is water again at home; I can now have a long slow shower instead of a very quick garden one (you never know if anyone is watching).

 I have water again…..

Sunday, a very wet day.  A double tank south, to “Hogwarts” and “Manta” large Morays and groupers seen.  Most people were a little sick during the surface interval, including me the sea really was very choppy.  What took our minds of things was a Turtle was spotted.  The Turtle was in fact meters from another dive shops boat, we didn’t shout to them as they all appeared to be asleep (on their surface interval).  When I got back to the shop I was asked to out again, this time to “Mikes Cupboard”, another Turtle seen, lots of amazing fish what a wonderful ocean of amazing creatures we have.

 Tofo is returning to normal after the Crimbo season.

Monday, went on a dive to “Giants Castle” or part of it because the drop was not great.  As I dropped I saw my depth was not what it should have been, therefore I grouped everyone together at the correct depth and swam in the direction I knew the reef to be (with the aid of my trusty compass).  Once we found the reef I could see we were on the south end of the 600 meters of reef.  The customers had problems keeping at 5 meters for 3 minutes the safety stop, one of them was far too busy with his camera on a selfie stick.  In my mind i could see myself grabbing it and snapping it in half.  In reality I smiled at him and helped him keep at the required depth.  Later I did an ocean safari with a full boat of adults and children, when I saw how young some of the kids were I decided that they couldn’t go in the sea and they would have to wear life jackets.  After a quick boat to boat transfer of an upset child and a sea sick adult we were off.  Unfortunately only Dolphins were spotted, which still brought a smile to every ones faces.  I did manage to snorkel with a bait ball of fish just under the surface.

Adjustments made to the beach sign

This is not a S**T painting

Tuesday, my day off.  I didn’t walk more than 5 meters from the house.  For the last few weeks I have been house sitting for the lovely Chris being looked after by his 4 cats.  Tomorrow I move as he returns, this has meant that today I have tried my best to keep out of the way of the housekeeper.  As I don’t want to mess up the house.

Wednesday, it’s that time again when I have to arrange my visa run, as next week I start house sitting for Nadia while she is away I have to be back on Monday so I am going a couple of days earlier. Got to go on a lovely drift dive to “Giants”, the GPS co-ordinates have been adjusted so today’s drop was better than a few days ago.  A lovely drift dive at 30 meters.  In the evening I went to a Braai at Justin’s house, a few friends lots of food and good music, oh and plenty of mozzie spray.  I waddled home a little late, I have moved to my bosses house which I have looked after before.

 Suunto the swimming puppy is my housemate for a couple of nights.

Thursday.  A day of arranging the visa run its been decided that I go tomorrow.  Patrick and I are taking a slightly different route.  We are catching a different bus from a place called Maxixe about 30km from Tofo.  We are getting a lift to Inhambane then taking a small ferry to Maxixe.  The bus will take us to Maputo, it’s cheaper and were told a better bus which is also quicker.  The ticket has been bought and the lift for the morning arranged.  Went to “Clownfish” for me a fun dive I wasn’t actually helping anyone, the water was very warm.  In fact at noon today the temperature was 39c and guess what I was wearing a wet suit it was so good to be in the sea and the swimming pool afterwards.  It really is summer here. Got home and packed ready for the trip.

Tofo needs you, yes you

Braaing at Justin’s place

In other news, said goodbye to the Finnish family that have been with us for a few weeks.  Said goodbye to Stephanie and Luc (he is not French) who I have dived with a few times over the last couple of weeks.  Most important is Patrick is leaving after 2 months.  He will travel to South Africa with me and still see Star Wars of course.  Over the last 8 weeks we have become good friends spending most of our time together, I  will really miss him but I have made a friend who I will visit in Finland later in the year.  I will continue the morning beach commute and remember the good times with my mate Pat.  Skype with SAZ and the kids until her battery died. 

 My buddies is bigger than mine.

This week I have been watching: emmmm, nothing. 

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (01 & 02/01/2016 and 07 & 08/03/2007) “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (07/01/2016),  “LBC Podcast: In Conversation, Eddie Izzard & David Tennant”, “Morrissey”, “The Cure”, “Pulp”, “Sleeper”.

Reading: “The Hitchhickers Guide To the Galaxy”, by Douglas Adams, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

Ready for Work in Croydon

I do love a Starbucks.

Week 80, Saturday 26^th December 2015 until Friday 1^st January 2016.

Happy B’day Brother-in-Law Tim for 1^st January

Portuguese word of the week: “ Ano Novo” which means New Year.  

All I can say is thank “The Great Pumpkin” that the fuss about one day(a single day) is over, not everyone is mad about celebrating a so called special day (whispering) it’s for kids.

One of my fave pics of Anaia

Jesse telling me a secret.

Revs staff at Croydon

Beautiful Croydon..Nah.

As this is the last So-Called Blog of 2015, I thought I would again just show nice pictures from the year.  The usual rubbish will return next week once the hangover and flu has disappeared.

The local news was wrong

Mum.

Revs staff at Croydon

Beautiful Croydon..Nah.

Its not Starbucks….

Caption comp…..

At work

End of a hard day.

Its a tough job…

Some one has to do it.

Diving bubbies.

On the town.

Do miss the Viking

Yes we can see you Vik.

I actually look half decent in this.

My usual work look.

Geeking out.

Learning German is fun, Ja.

In other news:  I have been feeling better, still blocked up (nose wise) but I am able to dive, and have been to “Salon” terrible viz and “Sherwood Forest” amazing viz and saw an Eagle Ray.  Went to see the nearest Tofo has to a Dr, he confirmed I didn’t have Malaria (which I knew) and gave me pills. I lent a man I know some money, he said he’d pay me back on 27^th, guess what he did all of it, I still have faith in human kind. The lovely Denise who I have been co-house sharing left to return to Germany, a real pity such a lovely women who I hope will remain friends.  We found a small Mantis (it looks like a twig) at the dive centre I called him Colin. Having water problems at Casa Chris, luckily I have a number of 5 litre bottles. Walked on the beach on New Years Day and had a pizza.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Doctor Who: “”, “An Adventure in Space and Time”, (BBC, 2013), “Hot Tub Time Machine”, ( 20XX), “Hot Tub Time Machine 2”, (20XX), “Casino Royle”, (2006), “Quantum of Solace”, (2008),

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (24 25 & 26 & 27 & 28 & 29 & 30 & 31/12/2015 & 06/03/2007 ), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (30/12/2015), “Morrissey”, “Florence and the Machine” , “PJ Harvey”, “The Beatles”, “Smiths”.

Reading: “The Hitchhickers Guide To the Galaxy”, by Douglas Adams, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

One last drink in London

MOZ and i near London bridge

Week 79, Saturday 19^th December until Crimbum Day Friday 25 December 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: Feriado, which means “Holiday”, which is what this week appears to because sleepy Tofo has been invaded.

I said good bye to the people that matter

Heathrow Airport 13 Sept

This is the week when a lot of the world shuts down.  Here in Tofo you don’t get many mentions of Crimbum certainly not from the locals, thought a lot of the prices have gone up.  The town is full of 4x4s and quad bikes straining to get up sand roads because there being ridden by very large South Africans in shorts with socks and sandals.  The expats of course do celebrate; they don’t need an excuse to party, Tofo loves a fancy dress party, in fact there’s a dress up party almost every month the good people of Tofo know how to celebrate.

Hello Tofo

But I really can’t be bothered, yes I know that’s not good.  I have spent most of this week unwell and at home boring the cats with my coughing.  I have been ill before over here but this is the longest period that I have been  out of the water.

Liz, Nadia and Chris

Cake made by Chris

Due to this week being special (it’s not, it’s really just another week but I don’t want to upset people that go all gooey around this period).  I have decided that this weeks So-Called Blog will be the best of the worst pictures that I have taken since I returned to Tofo in September.

Down town Tofo market

The boat ready for a dive

I do get wet

My little hut that i had for a couple of months

Every 30 days i have to South Africa

always enjoy a Mug & \bean and spend a day in the cinema

My commute to work

Mind the gap and the crowds

Long and pretty

This beauty was sunning herself by the pool

I geek out.

And get to be creative.

Made some great friends

People always smile here.

When not working i love to sleep

Take an outside shower.

In other news this week. Had the regular Saturday Branco I had one pizza, Patrick had two, yes TWO.  I finished the “No Parking” signs.  Denise and I sat in the dark when the power went out only to discover that it was not a power cut but our credit had run out.  Luckily I was put in contact with a man who can help even at 9pm.  Lead an Ocean Safari in which Denise came on I think she enjoyed seeing Dolphins but not a lot else. I’m learning German as well as Portuguese now.  Skype with Home on 25^th, even though I’m not a Crimbum person I would be there and enjoy it if I was home, it was good to see them happy.

Eat with…….

friends.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

There’s always room for a Pigeon pic

Poor Jelly fish getting washed up

This week I have been watching: “Doctor Who: “Hell Bent”, (Season 9/35, eps 12), “Extant”,(Season 1, eps 10 to 11) , “Avitar”, (2009), “Star Trek”, (2009), “Star Trek: Into Darkness”, (2013), “Papillon”, (1973), “Star Wars: A New Hope”, (1977)

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (19 & 20 & 24/12/2015) & (05/07/2006), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (23/12/2015), LBC Podcast: Iain Lee”, (29/07/2007) “Morrissey”, “Sleeper”, “Pulp”, “Smiths” and NO FRAKKING CRIMBUM SONGS

Reading: “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 78, Saturday 12^th December until Friday 18^th December 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Trovao”, which means “Thunder”, we had a lot of Thor throwing his hammer around the sky this week.

Saturday: Yes it’s cheeky but I had a day off, because we got home so late last night I needed to rest.  It was my weekly Branco’s with Patrick, Michael Moye also joined today..  Had a very interesting chat with a man I have met before but don’t really know about Zimbabwe a place I would like to visit.  All my worldly belongings are in Patricks hut because I’m technically homeless.  I stayed the night at his.

 Mike trying to stop SAZ from leaving.

Sunday, During most of the day we have had thunder rumbling nearer and nearer it’s been very hot today.  Towards the end of the day it started to rain.  And in the rain we walked home, we came up the dunes a little early which meant that we had to walk a little further than expected in the rain I was getting a little grumpy I admit.  Went to Chris house to meet his cats and see the home I’m moving in to for a few weeks.

 Patrick explaining by his conctoimconcetp for lonely people.

Monday, another very rainy, windy, thunder and lighten sort of day. Because of the rain and due to our location by an old lagoon we were infested with small flying insects, everyone was complaining.  In the afternoon the conditions got better which meant we could launch on a hastily arranged double tank to “Sherwood Forest” and “Salon”.   A large grouper was seen on “Sherwood”, but the treat was on “Salon” an Octo going about his afternoon.  After work I moved to Chris house, I’m not there my own a friend of his is also helping to look after the cats.

 Laranja, resting after a busy day.

Tuesday, Still very European weather.  Been working on the beach sign, its taking time due to other things happening. I have been making stencils out of masking tape so much quicker than last year’s cutting out letters on paper and sticking them on to the sign. This afternoon I lead a dive to “Giants”, we had a Small Eye Stingray and 2 Turtles what away to end the working day.

 The beach sign.

Wednesday: This is officially the rainy season, but from memory we didn’t have much last year.  I went on three dives today two to “Giants” and one to “Clownfish”.  The first “Giants” didn’t go quite to plan as the customer had a few issues with getting down to depth.  Mike, Viivi and I just hung about on the reef for a while.  The second dive was much better, the recent bad weather has helped clear the viz.  Once on dry land I thought I would get out of the wetsuit, no I was needed for another dive to “Clownfish”.  I really did try to get back to the to the buoy line that I had set at the start of the dive.  I didn’t make it I’m getting closer each time but that’s no excuse.  Denise my flatmate at Chris house made a great meal a huge salad.

 A lovely meal at the end of a busy day diving.

Thursday; another day consisting of three dives, for the first time since I returned I went north to “Office” and “Reggies” it takes about 30 mins to reach these dive sites by boat.  Once again the viz at depth was breath taking.  The only big things seen at “Office” were a couple of lager Groupers.  Once on the surface everyone settled down with hats sun cream and relaxed for the surface interval of an hour and a half.  I actually fell asleep in a puddle during the surface interval..  At “Reggies” had 2 white tip reef sharks and a Jenkins ray.  Back on dry land I kitted up for the third dive of the day to “Salon” in which I took a group of 6 diving.  The high light were a number of Octos, one was having an argument with a lion fish. I was so happy to get out of my wetsuit as I had been wearing it all day.

 Liking what Nelson has done to his hair.

Friday, the sun is back in full force summer has returned.  I went on another double take this time south.  “Hogwarts” didn’t produce anything but “Manta Reef” lived up to its name.  We saw a Reef Manta only briefly but we saw it, that’s the first Manta I have seen since I got back. Tonight there has been a water problem at Chris place we had to text him in Germany for instructions, its looking like all has been sorted.  The cats I am looking after are starting to trust me and let my hand stroke them.  I am so tired after the number of double tanks I have done this week; honestly I’m not complaining anything is better than Croydon Council

 The Viking will be missed a lot.

In other news this week, liquid lost Viktor the Viking, Sazzle and Joonas (he is back in Feb next yr), still very sad to see such nice people I have got to know and dive with leave.  I made a donation to a good cause, it’s only a few pound but if it makes the person’s life better then that’s a good thing.  Tofo is getting busier the silly season has commence how do I know, the jet skis are on the water and there are lots more large 4x4s in town.  Henrick on of the bosses boys watched new Doctor Who with Patrick and I think he enjoyed it.

 Poor Mia has a bandaged ankle and a very swollen paw, such a friendly dog..

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Doctor Who: “Heaven Sent”, (Season 9/35, eps 10).

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (11 & 13/12/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (16/12/15), “Morrissey”, “Smiths”, “Toto”, “Sleeper”, “Coldplay”.

Reading: “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique & Nels SA (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 77, Saturday 5^th December until Friday 11^th December 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Café”, meaning “Coffee”, as in I love a Coffee and a Muffin when In SA.

 Look at the size of that muff.

Happy B’day on December 5^th to Nico and 10^th to Sigrida…

Saturday.  I noticed a small bird just sitting around not flying or making noise like the others.  I approached the chick which didn’t make a run for it.  I put a finger out and he/she hopped on the end so I put the little one high up out of harm’s way.  I have looked about hiring a car for the visa run next week, but it’s a lot more expensive than I thought.  Therefore it looks like Patrick and I will be on the fatties bus and chappa. Started work on a large sign that will go on the beach.  Emmm had the traditional Saturday Brancos.

I pulled a bird and i liked it.

Sunday:  I noticed that small bird was in Liquids backyard again.  Once again I put the chick up high and kept an eye on it for was long as possible.  However after a while I couldn’t see it anymore, hope its ok.  I carried on with my sign making, I’m not a sign writer and it shows.  Around midday we were told we could go home.  The early afternoon ended up involving an unexpected walk on the beach seeing a number of Jelly fish who had been washed up, which makes me sad.  Visited the Tofinho monument with Patrick because he plays an on-line game, the monument has been used as a portal (I don’t really understand).  Had a lovely shower in the garden and then a nap, what a great way to spend a Sunday.

 Tofo porn.

Monday, was my day off. Spent the morning painting a picture for my sister-in-laws b’day on the 10^th. Our tickets for the bus to Maputo tomorrow morning have been bought. I have packed up my little house as in a few days I move to Chris for a month. Skyped with SAZ and the kids.  Patrick and I had our first home made meal together, well we share the same kitchen after all.

 Emmmm, eggs.

Tuesday. Such a long day, the bus picked us up at about 04.15 we only had one break just over half way through the trip arriving at Maputo about 13.30.  A cab driver wanted to take us to the border for 2500mets each, we politely refused.  Once on the chappa we sat there and watched the world go by, with people constantly trying to sell us everything apart from the kitchen sink.  These small buses only leave when full, this meant we waited nearly 3 hours. Getting through the border was easiest part of the day arriving in Nels about 22.30, Jari then picked us up.

 The Fatties bus, its as uncomfortable as it looks.

Wednesday was cinema day.  New James Bond “Spectre” made London look shiny. “The Hunger Games, Mockinjay Part 2”, was too long but really enjoyed it.  “Peanuts the Movie” was fun.  We ended the day with an unknown “Bus 657” I have to say it’s a good film really glad I saw it.  I eat so much popcorn that I had to top it off with a Wimpy.

People trying to sell everything and anything in Maputo.

Thursday. Was the shopping day, but first we hiked up a steep hill in very hot temps to see the football shaped water tank that overlooks the city. The view over Nels really was breath taking bet it’s pretty at night.  After a cab ride down the hill, the shopping commenced I just got essentials sun cream and bug spray stuff like that.  I had to visit Mug & Bean to use there Wi-Fi, oh and have a coffee.  However straight after this we ended up in McD’s, eating a patty of cow in a bun really is so nice, even though I feel guilty.  We visited a number of shops because Patrick needed a fan, which meant we were hot due to the scorching sun so we ended up drinking ice cold beer outside while waiting for the cab.

 It was worth the trek up the hill.

Friday after a very quick brekkie our ride home arrived.  Michael Moye picked us up in his lovely car with air con.  After stopping for some shopping we left Nels and headed for home.  There was one thing that made us laugh all the way home, a religious book shop in Nels called “CUM”, it just makes me laugh thinking about it.  The border was busy we waited in traffic on the SA side for nearly 2 hours, getting through the Moz side was quick and easy.  We took the gravel road which took its toll on the car resulting in a large puncture. Luckily Patrick knows what to do and got dirty doing it with help from a local man.  Michael and I watched as there wasn’t much we could do.  We found that there was a tyre shop further on along our route; we just reached them before they closed. We really were lucky all of this could have happened in the middle of nowhere.  Even with this delay we made good time.  Everyone took time behind the wheel, during my stint we got pulled over.  The police officer told me I was doing 70 in a 60 zone and wanted us to look at the speed camera.  I definitely wasn’t speeding the guys backed me up, we stood our ground.  After about 5 minutes we were eventually told to leave, this proves that they didn’t have any evidence and that it was a scam as surly they wouldn’t have let us go.  We reached home at 22.30.

 The Three Stoogies, Michael, Patrick and Mo.

It’s been a good trip but I’m so glad to be home, I don’t have to think about the visa run for another month.

 Queue to get out of SA. 

In other news this week, note to self, don’t buy very cheap flip flops from the market, that last less then 5 days.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Doctor Who: “Face the Raven”, (Season 9/35, eps 10), “Extant”, (Season 1, eps 9), “Olympus Has Fallen”, (2013), “Tron Legacy”, (2010), “The Matrix”, (1999), “Spectre”, (Bond 25) (2015), “The Hunger Games, Mockingjay part 2”, (2015), Peanuts The Movie”, (2015), “Bus 657”, (2015).

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (05 & 06/12/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (09/12/15), “Morrissey”, “The Cure”, “Shed Seven”.

Reading: ” The Bees”, by Laline Paull, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 76, Saturday 28^th November until Friday 4^th December 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Chaves”, Keys, as in, were the frakk are those keys.

Happy B’day on December 2^nd to MOZ, SAZ and HEL….

Saturday, the painting carried on at the dive shop as the regeneration of Liquid continues. Alberto and I were painting a small room that leads to the new classroom (the old gear room). We were desperately trying not to get paint on each other, I was up a ladder doing the top half of the walls and he was doing the bottom. We managed to get pint on the walls not on each other.

 A sleepy Viking and Carlo’s new pen tatt.

Sunday: The high light was rushing to grab my dive gear and get in the pool to assist Mike and Fanni with a DSD (Discover Scuba Diving) session. I didn’t bother with a wetsuit just swimming cozzie and scuba gear which felt strange. Really enjoyed the session and helping customers who were totally new to scuba get a feel for breathing under water was really enjoyable. Soon after I was leading a dive to “Salon”, the big highlight a large Octo. At the end of the day Patrick and I stopped at “Tofo Tofo” for one beer, three beers and a T-bone steak later we waddled home putting the world to rights.

  Days off are tiring.

Monday, my day off. I took mine and Patricks washing up to the bosses’ house. I don’t wear a lot, what I mean is during the work week I wear a Liquid t-shirt and shorts with swimming stuff underneath, at home I’m usually in PJ’s, so the amount of washing was not a lot. I made sure that I had an afternoon nap, these days off can be so tiring.

 One of the B’day girls, pic taken in April 2015 at the Olympic village Stratford.  Yes its wine in the cups.

Tuesday, Happy b’day to my sisters SAZ and Hel and best friend MOZ. Lead a very full boat on safari, we came across a Whale Shark but by the time the customers were ready it had gone. We did see what we think were sharks on the surface but they didn’t hang either. Pippy (the small dog) bite a little girl who of course panicked and fell over two wall’s and broke a small water mains pump. I managed to take her hand and brought her back to the shop to clean her wound and bandaged her leg. This evening was new Doctor Who night Patrick and I stayed after work, with Joey pulling up a stool to watch the final 20 minutes.

   The geekness spread this week to include Joey.

Wednesday. Got to work, I couldn’t find a key to open a interior door. Then I had an idea, I climbed up and looked over the new wall (made of hardboard) and sure enough the keys were where they used to be. This is not much use anymore as the padlock is now on the outside. I was about to try and climb over the wall (its 8 or more feet high), when one of the local Liquid guys Manuel stopped me. He climbed over it with ease and recovered the keys. Lead another Ocean Safari, a small number of Dolphins spotted but they didn’t want to play.

 It really was big, look at the jaws on that.

Thursday. Went on a dive to “Giants” Sarah leading for the first time. As I dropped in to the blue, I noticed that at 24metres the viz cleared so I could actually see around me. Sure enough we dropped in the wrong place due to current and ended up at 39 metres. We all rose a little and looked at our compasses and made our way in the direction of the reef, which appeared shortly after. Once at “Giants we saw that we were at the south of the reef, there wasn’t much we could do just drift with it and keep ascending. Highlight, I did see the large Potato Grouper who hugs the reef wall.

 My current addiction.

Friday. I went on a dive to “Fingers”, saw a couple of Leaf fish which are always a delight. But the highlight were the football sized Jellyfish floating all around us. While the others are looking at beautiful fish, I’m up close and personal loving the Jellies, they look just so alien as the pulsate through the water. The plan was to then make our way to “Salon”, we never made it. But I was happy with all the Jelly action. Have started to paint a new sign for the beach (more to follow). At the end of the day couldn’t locate the new gear room keys, will check with everyone tomorrow.

 One of the football sizes Jellies on the sand, I did try to get it back in the sea.

In other news. I’m worried that I have been a total and complete bitch. Continued to try and learn Portuguese I’m supposed to be 19%. Chased a large spider around the hut for 10 minutes the jaws on it were huge. Feel for my friends and family in the UK as winter officially started on Tuesday. Bought some eggs to boil, I did and then eat them all…opps. Lost an entire series on my hard drive, but Patrick who is a dive instructor and computer techy recovered it, I had somehow moved it in to the Doctor Who file. Have started to organise next week’s visa run…

 This was found at the bottom of the pool, the mystery was solved in the end….

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Doctor Who: “Sleep No More”, (Season 9/35, eps 9), “Da-Vinci’s Demon”, (Season 1, eps 1 to 2), “Extant”, (Season 1, eps 1 to 8), “Star Trek: Renegades”, (2015),

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (28 & 29/11/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (02/12/15), “Morrissey”, “Ash”, “Shed Seven”, “Tiffany”, “All About Eve”, “The Cure”, “Lana Del Ray”.

Reading: ” The Bees”, by Laline Paull, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 75, Saturday 21^st November until Friday 27^th November 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Pescadores”, as in Fishermen who should know better.

  It was a froggy and toad weekend in the pool.

Saturday: A very quiet day helped Satu do a stock take on things like masks, snorkels and weights. This evening most of the Liquid family got together for a braai. I am not good with social events; I made my excuses shortly after everyone arrived. This sort of thing would have left me in tears for hours but now it’s just a few minutes. Deep down I regret not going but I also know that it’s the best thing as I just end up at the periphery of the group and end up talking to a pot plant or a dog. More importantly I discovered that there are two chicks on the nest.

Sunday, today was a Liquid housekeeping day, were moving all of the dive gear to a new room, but first there are preparations that need to be made. This meant that people have been cleaning and cutting wood, climbing ladders and generally sorting things out. Once the new gear room is fully operational it will make the setting up of a dive a little easier and possibly quicker. Had a Brancos pizza with new guy Patrick who I discovered is a Doctor Who fan I think you can guess what we talked about. Got home and found that both the chicks were out of the nest, I saw them walking around and wing flapping. Mum came over and fed them, shortly after she flew away both of the chicks took flight one at a time.

 Vic and Bob being watch by Sue there mum.

Monday, my day off. I really didn’t do much I slept, painted and watched an unhealthily amount of Sci-Fi TV. An annoying power cut lasted for over an hour in the early evening. The power kept coming on and off almost every second, lights would flash on and off, my fan would spring to life then die. I decided to get under my net and read my Kindle and listen to music.

 A two tone dive shop.

Tuesday. Another morning of power cuts, once the morning dive had gone a few of us started to continue the redecoration of Liquid. This meant knocking down a concrete partition and starting to paint the place white. I was mainly on painting duty by the end of the day we had half the room completed. Patrick my fellow Doctor Who fan and I stayed after work we had a DW ”lock-in” and watched an episode with Finnish subtitles. It turns out that Finland is the same amount of episodes behind as I am. Over the next few weeks I am looking forward to catching up. Patrick and I have formed our own little DW group (all welcome). I looked after Chinela the dog for a few hours this evening. Skype with home lovely chatting with SAZ and mum and the kids.

 It was in English luckily.

Wednesday. Walked to Liquid with Patrick along the beach, I spent a lot of the day in the sea. I lead 2 ocean safari’s. As a result I snorkelled with 3 (possibly 4) Whalesharks, 2 (possibly 3) Leatherback Turtles, 2 Devil Rays and saw a number of Dolphins from the boat. The Jelly Fish bloom has started all around there are football sized Jellies just minding their own business. I love to get close and just watch them there very relaxing. On a down side I was bluebottled on my forehead and top lip and arms again.

 This bluebottle on the sand didn’t get me.  There pretty when you get to look at them.

Thursday, Walked along the beach again with Patrick, sadly we came across a group of local fishermen that had caught a juvenile Ray (it was still big) the poor thing had been butchered. I asked if I could take pics to try to ID the species. There is not a lot of edible meat on a Ray, and the fishermen know that they shouldn’t be catching them. I got to go on a double tank south to “Manta” and “Chamber of Secrets”. It was a little rough going out as the wind was picking up, however it was on the surface interval between the dives and the way home that the sea was big and the wind and spray battered us. A number of highlights on “Manta” these included schooling Big Eyed Trevally on our safety stop, a large puffer who had large chucks (bite marks) out the back end of its body, it was still alive but the poor chap must have been on pain. A large Turtle and a Ray both having a snooze on the sea floor (not together). The rest of the day was spent making cardboard guitars for Nadia to take to an 80s party tomorrow.

 Walking to work, I cant stop smiling when I see this site.

Friday. A day of painting the dive centre, I also continuing to make cardboard guitars and a large Pac-Man for the 80s party. Went on a safari and we were lucky with another Whaleshark there such peaceful beautiful creature. Once of the customers then complained of feeling ill (not seasickness), so we had to return to land quickly. I used my first aid training to help the woman, checking her pulse and keeping her talking while the captain got us back to the beach faster than normal. All was ok, but I have asked her to get checked out by a doctor at some point soon. A number of 80s tunes were played loudly at the dive shop this afternoon in honour of the party tonight. The residents of Tofo love a party, but they love a fancy dress one even more. The Pigeon chicks appear to have left I haven’t seen them for a couple of days now. I really enjoyed watching them develop I hope the nest gets used again.

 I made these for the 80s party, there basic but fun.

In other news this week, continued to learn Portuguese, have tried to start using little words here and there, such as order my roll from the “Bread Shack”. Discovered I have a hot water, boiler but it doesn’t appear to work. Had a very nice group of Argentinians singing loudly on the boat, such a happy group of people. I have some holiday pay due to me from my time with Croydon Council, I didn’t even know I was entitled to any holiday; the money will go a long way in Tofo. Listening to Erasure brought back some memories which also made me slightly sad.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Defiance (Season 2, eps 9 to 13) & (Season 3, eps 1 to 13), “Doctor Who: The Zygon Inversion”, (Season 9/35, eps 8).

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (21 & 22 & 26/11/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (25/11/15), “Morrissey”, “Ash, “The Kooks”, “Natalie Imbruglia”. “Erasure”, “Queen”.

Reading: ” The Bees”, by Laline Paull, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique & Maputo (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 74, Saturday 14^th November until Friday 20^th November 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Queijo”,which means “Cheese”, I miss real Cheese.

  That’s Tofo for you.

Saturday, still in Matola a suburb of Maputo. There’s nothing to say apart from spent the day at the garage nodding off in a chair sitting under a Mango tree. One large Mango fell just missing Jasmin and Chinela. Whenever I’m in Maputo it rains, and sure enough we had a storm and a lot of rain.  At around 4pm there was a “Top Gear” moment when the car rolled up to the office “It’s alive” Jasmin and i hugged and applauded Teo the mechanic.   We took the car for a spin to Shoprite (it’s like ASDA) the sound of the rain on the roof of the shop was deafening.  Coming back Jasmin felt water on her foot; I hoped it was just rain. But back at the garage we discovered that there was a hole in the radiator. Were now hope to leave late afternoon tomorrow.

 We had a proper driver home.

Sunday, the hotel was starting to feel like home, there are a number of men there who come from SA and Oz who work in Maputo for a period of time then go home. After brekkie we made our way to the garage, at about 12.45 we were told that everything was good.  We were packed and left around 13.30 only stopping half way through the journey at Xia Xia arriving home at about 10pm.  Driving at night here is not fun, there are people walking around with nothing to make you aware that there until your headlights pick them up.  You have to drive with full beam on dipping them when other traffic approaches; I wish that others did this as there were times when I had to slow down as I couldn’t see because the lights were so bright.  It was good to see home again after nearly a week.

  My home for a couple of days in Maputo.

Monday, I took today off just because I didn’t sleep well and when I did it was in the early hours of the morning. I think I was buzzing still after the drive. I cleared the car and took it back to the bosses house, after making my way to the market for supplies including recharging my internet dongle. The wind is up and I later found out that there was no diving so a good day to be off.  I spent the day painting last weeks “Shit painting of the week” (it didn’t get finished due to the delay in getting back) and having an afternoon nap.

 Seen near the garage, there almost like exhibits just left on the street.

Tuesdays, back at the dive shop. In the afternoon I lead a very full boat on Ocean Safari, we had a small number of dolphins who didn’t hang around which is a pity. We’re all getting job descriptions soon, so everyone knows what their responsibilities are, be interesting to see mine.  Small power cut in the early evening.

  Thomas, the friendly mobile phone airtime man and chicken farmer. 

Wednesday, we are supposed to get rain for 24hrs, it started very hot and sticky.  Around 11am things went quiet there was no breeze the sky got darker the storm had arrived. The display of thunder and lightning was impressive over the lagoon a few of us sat watching it approaching.  The rain lashed down for maybe 2 hrs.  I did a scuba review for Viktor’s girlfriend (Lady Viking) however her afternoon dive was canx due to the conditions.  My dive to “Sherwood Forest” did take place, this was my first time at this site since I returned, the last time I was there was for Mike and Justin’s naked dive.

 Painting by candle light.

Thursday was a wet day, it was raining when I got up and walked to work, yes im walking again. Opened up and discovered a number of toads enjoying the swimming pool, I fished them out and made sure they were happy where I left them. I helped set up and de-rig a number of dives during the day that was my main task.  I also spent some time in the pool with Suunto the puppy in the morning then the bosses boys in the afternoon.

 That’s my little finger to give you scale how small this moth is.

Friday, you can tell it’s nearly the weekend as the power cuts have started. The pigeon nest has over the last few days looked abandoned I haven’t seen anyone on it. This morning there was a little face looking at me.  I noticed this evening that it is the Pigeon who is visiting the nest so that baby is not on its own; I am very excited by this.  Went on a dive to a new site “Fingers” with Sarah and The Viking.  Saw blue spotted rays having sex (we think) a huge number of schooling fish, a massive lobster, an Octo and 3 leaf fish.  It’s a stunning place can’t wait to go back.  The rest of the day was spent in the shop trying to stop Suunto from getting in the pool when teaching was taking place and from running away when anybody left the shop.  Oh there were 5 toads in the pool this morning.

  I’m an aunty to a Pigeon, watching the nest closely, but not too close to scare the parents away.

In other news, Viktor played Toto’s “Africa” as a storm was starting.  Mozziebeak has passed a plastic bag law, from December shops will charge 3 mets for them, let’s hope it make a difference and helps the environment.  Sat for about 10 mins at dusk in the dark after the power went out then remembered I had candles (“DoH”).  Still trying to learn Portuguese according to the app im using I am 10% fluent, more like 0.010%. Made mash but didn’t have a masher had to use a folk.

 Its the law.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Defiance (Season 2, eps5 to 8), “Blackadder the Third”, (Blackadder Season 3, eps 1 to 6), “Blackadder Goes Forth”, (Blackadder season 4, eps 1 to 6), “Top Gear”, (Season 10, eps 2 & 3), “The Graham Norton Show”, (Season 18, eps 6), “Star Wars: Rebels”, (Season 1, eps 6).

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (13 & 14/11/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (18/11/15), “Morrissey”, “Sleeper”, “Lana Del Ray”, “Toto”, “The Bluetones”, “Smiths”.

Reading: ” The Bees”, by Laline Paull, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.

Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Tofo Mozambique & Nels (SA) and Maputo (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 73, Saturday 7^th November until Friday 13^h November 2015.

Portuguese word of the week: “Chionela”, Flip flop or a dogs name.

 I didn’t sample these, maybe next time.

Saturday. Lead 2 dives, the first to “Giants”, the drop was off I knew from the location and the depth, but my trusty compass lead me in the right direction. Once at the reef found we were actually half way along still a nice drift dive. The second was to the Mighty “Clownfish”, I dropped to tie the anchor line and again the drop was slightly off I couldn’t see the spot but my wrist compass come in handy a second time. I nearly made it back to the line was less than 10 metres away, my natural nav is getting better. The dive shop was taken over by children in scary outfits for Halloween (I know it was last week), the children of Tofo celebrated trick or treat today. Went and took Suunto the puppy for a road trip to the petrol station and to play at Liquid for a while he loves the pool so was in there straight away. On the way home met a couple of friends I hadn’t seen for a while chatted and promised to catch up soon.

Sunday. Woke up at 6am with no electric or water, later found out that it’s a “planned powercut” nothing due back on until 5pm. Very quiet day at the shop, Mikes computer had charge so he let me watch a couple of things (a Seth Macfarline fest). The power came back at 4.30pm. Early evening there was a beach volleyball comp, Liquid played but didn’t win, I went for support and to take pics. I didn’t hang around far too many people for my liking. I sloped off looking for milk. Things change here quickly at one point I was driving to SA Monday on my own, then Jasmin was coming along shotgun.

 Team Liquid in action, they were frakking good, because I didn’t play.

Monday. Today’s Ocean Safari had a Whaleshark. Back at the dive shop I kitted up for a dive to “Mikes Cupboard”. When I dropped there were 7 devil rays passing me, luckily Nadia saw them otherwise I don’t think anyone would have believed me. Something truly wonderful happed during the dive we had 2 very chilled Squid, I’ve never had Squid on scuba before. They were so chilled we got very close to them they didn’t dart of as expected. I could have spent the whole dive with them. Up at 4am as off to SA, im not driving now, I was looking forward to that trip another time maybe.

 How beautiful is this place,, can never get bored of this view.

Tuesday. I was told at 3.40am that I was taking the driving seat. Jasmin, Chionela the dog (who was going to the vets in Maputo) and I left at 4am. We made two 10min stops arriving in Maputo with 5 mins to spare; due to it being a public holiday everywhere was closing early. We then got stuck in terrible traffic taking Chionela to a friend of Jasmin (Teo) who was looking after her for a couple of days. During the drive to the border we saw a couple of accidents. One will stay with me forever, a chappa (small packed bus) had knocked over a small girl. She was maybe 4 years old, there was blood around her, on on her face. I saw her face she was dead. I will never forget that face. We didn’t stop due to the number of people there. In hindsight I feel we should have stopped but then what could I have done? After dropping Jasmin at friends I arrived at Mamma Mia B&B around 7pm.

 Road trip.

Wednesday, up early as had a dentist appointment, I got lost even with a map. The dentist and wife are divers and are coming to MoZ in December I gave them all of Liquid’s contact info. The appointment cast 523R (about £29) for examination, x-ray and good banter. The Dr said that an existing filling is near a nerve which was causing the recent pain. After I made my way to the Mall (I hate calling it that, but that’s what it is) and saw three films, no “Bond” in SA yet that will have to be for next month.

 I eat so much popcorn, but still could have had more.

Thursday, was the shopping day, Jasmin and I went here and there buying things as we went. I sent come cards for December at Postnet. Have started the “Shit painting of the week”.

 My Nels home “Mamma Mia B&B”, notice the cat in the background we had a long chat.

Friday the 13th, oops. What an adventure, left Nels at 4.30 am picked Jasmin up getting to the border just after 7am. We were on the open road in Mozziebeak at 8am. By 8.30 we had broken down, a warning light had come on and after contacting Teo we were advised to “STOP”. A man called Hennie stopped who towed us a few kms and left us under a bridge so we were in the shade (he said he would be back if we needed him). After an hour of chatting and laughing, what else could we do, Teo arrived. The engine had cooled so we were able to add lots of water this is when we found a leak. He works in Maputo but actually lived a few kms from where we were, what are the chances. He took us to the garage in Maputo where Jasmin was reunited with Chionela, he also took us to lunch and found a B&B nearby. The car should be fixed Saturday afternoon which means will be on the road home Sunday.

 We are not the Stig.

In other news this week. Dived with a group of very nice Jehovis Witnesses, when they said they were part of that church for a split second thought they were joking. Got blue bottled on Ocean Safari on the top lip again. Dropped a dive weight on my foot, it’s a little swollen. Bought bangers and mash from petrol station in SA.

 Nel’s is a strange place.

The Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have been watching: “Defiance (Season 2, eps4), “Doctor Who: Inversion of the Zygons”, (Season 9/35, eps 8), “Blackadder II”, (Blackadder Season 2, eps 1 to 6), “Blackadder the Third”, (Blackadder Season 3, eps 1 to 3), “Ted 2”, (2015), “Family Guy”, (Season 1, eps 1 to 2), “Bridge of Spies”, (2015), “Knock Knock”, (2015), “Goosebumps”, (2015), “Hostage” (2005), “Scrapheap Challenge”, (Season 11, ep 7).

This week I have mainly been listening to: ”LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (05 & 08/11/15), “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Mid-Week)”, (11/11/15), “Morrissey”, “Ash”, Shed Seven”, “Smith”, “Keen”, “Kate Bush”, “Lana Del ray”, “80s and 90s music on SA Radio station Jaconda”.

Reading: “Along Came a Spider”, by James Patterson, ” The Bees”, by Laline Paull, “Knit One, Kill Two”, by Maggie Sefton, “Morrissey List of the Lost”, by Morrissey and “A Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire” book 2 “ A Clash of Kings” by George R.R. Martin.