Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Northamptonshire, East, South & South West London. Surrey & Suffolk (Southwold) (The NEXT Chapter).
Week 279 Saturday 19th until Friday 25thOctober 2019.
I have $10, 000,000 waiting for me, that’s about £7,781,000. This week I received an email from a total stranger, let’s call him Mr Banker (pronounced at the start with a silent “W”) who works for a US bank and recently found during an audit, the account of a man who died years ago with no family, and 10m dollars in the account. 50% of that total (£3, 890.500) would be mine at the end of the transaction.
“Lovely visit to mums for her special day (which was actually a couple of days before this meeting)”.
Mr Banker is obviously a fine judge of character; he said that he chose me out of everyone on the internet, because he knew that I am a totally trustworthy person! As soon as I digested the email I started to imagine what I could do with that money. Unfortunately, it’s not enough for a visit to the International Space Station. But i could probably hire a Hollywood A-list actress for a few minutes to pretend to be my friend and be seen in the local Sainsbury’s. Or maybe the “Hoff” needs some spare change to be my naked bicycle rack for a few days. I would be able to buy a screen used full sized TARDIS for the garden and a handful of Daleks (does anyone have a full sized “Mechonoid” they don’t want?) scattered around the house. The friend I live with would absolutely love these cluttering up her lovely home (she wouldn’t!). With that amount of money I might also be able to buy one or more of the actual actors who played the Doctor, and have them stand in a corner in full costume. Of course when I’m not in the room they would be able to sit down, I’m not that nasty!
“Everyone arrived at the pub. My Little Lion boy was not impressed at my camera work”.
Mr Banker explained that he needed to move the money from the US into a foreign account. If my bank account wasn’t suitable, he kindly suggested that I open a special account just for this transaction. Being a caring banker, he would ensure that all legalities and any taxes incurred would be dealt with. I won’t lie for a fraction of a billionth of a second I did wonder if this was the once in a lifetime chance I have always hoped for! Millions would be lovely, but a couple of thousand or even a few hundred pounds would help make a difference. Sadly I didn’t listen very often to advice that my parents gave me. But the one thing I do remember is, if I want anything I have to work for it.
“Quick, call a Doctor”.
It was a surprise to get this e-mail; they were very popular a few years ago. Surely there are quicker digital ways of obtaining someone’s bank account info. But these phishing email must get replies otherwise why send them? If you would like a share of $10m then I can point you in the direction of the very nice and honest Banker. E-mail me your bank account and sort code to the following dedicated email address I have set up.
“Fun at mums”.
“My sister the firestarter, twisted firestarter”.
And Now For Something Completely Different……
“Tim, we can see you”.
This week a friend has been working for the same company for 29 years (you get less for murder!). I’m sure that they never thought they would still be there all these years later.
“Mum, still claims this is coffee”.
When I grew up the phrase “a job for life” was heard all the time. A young person left school went to work and stayed in the job until they retired. That is not the case these days, with zero hour contracts and temp work. As technology has improved, getting faster and smaller, working practices have changed completely, even during my time of going to work day after day.
“There is about 6 weeks between these pics”.
When my young nephews and niece (who hopefully will one day read this shiz) are working everything will have changed again. There may not be Hoverboards and flying cars, but I would imagine that almost everyone will works from home, never meeting their actual colleagues or travelling on public transport.
“What’s not to love about the Grand Union Canal”.
29 years with the same company is a long time. My friend could definitely tell interesting stories, maybe she should write this blog. I hate work, but of course I realise why I do it. Forget the reward of pay; I am contributing in a very small way to the greater good of the country. I’ve been in my current post for a couple of years and it’s definitely time to move on. There is a part of me that would like to be established in one place for such a long time like my friend. Maybe in another lifetime?
“Watching this Duck go round in circles was amusing”.
Stuck at lights the three cars in front had number plates that ended with “BOB”, “LWT” and “NOG”. Being a simple organism seeing these made me smile. When I see or hear the name “BOB” I think of “Blackadder”. “LWT” (London Weekend Television) makes me think of a favourite TV ident from the 70s and 80s. And “NOG” was a great character from Star Trek DS9, one of the few Trek characters that really grew over the years. Sadly the actor Aron Eisenberg died on the 21st September this year, aged 50.
“Cheers Mum. It was lovely seeing you and all the family”.
It would seem, I wrote the following “sorry so busty” in an email. Luckily it was to a friend, of course I meant “sorry so busy”. Honest!
“This tiny beauty was found roaming across the wheelie bin, when i needed it. It was re homed on the grass. I kept its money”.
Next week. Suffolk be afraid! Be very afraid! It’s the annual family migration to Southwold.
“I really do love Southwold, you wouldn’t know it from this shiz doodle”.
My Mid Life Crisis Conts……
“Sitting in Southwold, watching BBC twice??????? While trying to write this shiz “.
This week I have mainly been watching:
“Astronauts Escape Failing Rocket-Soyuz Did Not Go To Space Today (Scott Manley)”, (YouTube), (TX: 11/10/18). “Avengers: Infinity War”, (2018). “Big School”, (S2, ep 6). “Blakes 7”, (S1, ep 12 & ep 13). “Brian Gittens Challenged – Charles Petrescu Meltdown, (YouTube)”, (22/05/14). “Click”, (TX: 19/10/19). “Cul-De-Sac”, (S1, ep 2). “Daybreak”, (S1 & ep 2). “Dexter”, (S8, ep 1 to ep 3). “Fare Dodgers At War With The Law”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 21/10/19). “Giri/Haji”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 3). “Have I Got News For You”, (S58, ep 3, TX: 25/10/19). “Living With Yourself”, (S1, ep 1 & ep 2). “Lucy And D.i.C Couch Time: Who Chose Your Voice?”, (TX: 23/10/19). “NASA TV: Introducing Artemis Generation Spacesuits”, (TX: 15/10/19). “Own The Sky: Jet Pack Dreamer”, (TX: 17/10/19). “Poppy Hillstead: The Watch”, (ep 1 & ep 2). “Spiral”, (S7, ep 3 & ep 4). “Stargate SG1”, (S1, ep 17 to ep 19). “Terry Nation Army Extra: A Mechanical Appendix”, (TX: 22/10/19). “Terry Nation Army Mechonoid Special”, (TX: 14/10/19). “The Apprentice”, (S15, ep 4, TX: 23/10/19). “The Apprentice: Honest Subtitles”, (S5, ep 4, TX: 23/10/19). “The Apprentice: You’re Fired”, (S14, ep 4, TX: 23/10/19). “The Graham Norton Show”, (S26, ep 5, TX: 25/10/19). “The Great British Bake Off”, (S3 (S10), ep 9, TX: 22/10/19). “The Great British Bake Off; An Extra Slice”, (S3 (S6), ep 9, TX: 25/10/19). “The Great Model Railway Challenge”, (S2, ep 7, TX: 19/10/19). “The Hulu Hoop Challenge, Ft Charles Petrescu And Brian Gittens, (YouTube)”, (23/10/14). “The Little Rascals”, (1994). “The Name Of The Rose”, (S1, ep 2). “The Purge”, (S1, ep 2 to ep 4). “The Walking Dead”, (S10, ep 3). “Timeless”, (S1, ep 1). “Toast Of London”, (S2, ep 3). “Travelman 48hrs In….. Dubrovnik”, (S9, ep 1, TX: 21/10/19). “Van Helsing”, (S4, ep 4). “What Makes NASA’s Artemis Spacesuit The Best Spacesuit Yet? (Scott Manley)”, (YouTube), (TX: 18/10/19).
This week I have mainly been listening to:
“30 Animals That Made Us Smarter: LIVE (BBC World Service)”, (S1, ep 31, 21/10/19). “Daddy Look At Me”, (S2, ep 2, 24/10/19). “Gossipmongers”, (ep 5, 10/05/19)(ep 6, 20/05/19)(S2, Trailer 20/09/19)(ep 1, 28/09/19)(ep 2, 05/10/19)(ep 3, 12/10/19)(ep 4, 19/10/19). “Griefcast”, (ep 101, 23/10/19). “In Poor Taste”, (ep 109, 24/10/19). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (24/10/19). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (19/10, 25/10/19). “NASA: Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 114, 18/10/19). “Spacefall: A Blakes 7 Podcast”, (ep 12, 21/09/18)(ep 13, 28/108/18)(ep 14, Series A Special, 19/11/18). “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 164, 18/10/19). “Space Boffins”, (15/10/19). “Space Rocket History Archive”, (ep 29, 06/12/17)(ep 30 & ep 31, 11/12/17). “Strange Times”, (ep 321, 23/10/19). “Sue Perkins: An Hour Or So With….”, (ep 4, 17/10/19). “The Adam Buxton Podcast”, (ep 106, 25/10/19). “The All New Angelos And Barry Podcast”, (24/10/19). “The Nick Abbot Habit”, (21/10/19). “The Old Doctor Who Show”, (ep 2, 21/01/15)(ep 3, 16/02/15)(ep 4, 04/03/15). “Walking The Dog With Emily Dean”, (ep 26, 21/12/18)(ep 28, 14/01/19)(ep 46,21/08/19)(Diane Morgan Sequel, 09/09/19). “Morrissey”, “Lana Del Rey”, “Soft Cell”, “Artic Monkeys”, “Village People”, “Pet Shop Boys”, “Manic Street Preachers”, “David Bowie”, “Foals”, “Matt Berry And The Maypoles”, “Daft Punk”, “Elbow”, “Portishead”, “ELO”, “Stereophonics, Air”.