Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East and West London, Surrey (The NEXT Chapter).
Week 238 Saturday 5th until Friday 11th January 2019.
The season of good will or for the festival of excessive drunkenness and over eating has definitely ended. In the capital during the few weeks of old stringy tinsel and sparklingly lights (which could be a health hazard if looked at for too long) people seemed to be in a better mood. There are a number of reasons in my opinion for this, none of which have been scientifically researched (of course).
“A thing the shape of a Mushroom. Or a Mushroom shaped like a thingy”.
“People could have been happier because of”.
1/ The amount of food and drink consumed!
2/ Extra sleep! Due to being on holiday, people didn’t have to wake up day after day before sparrow fart!
3/ Not travelling on public transport, or sat in traffic jams! Both really do not help with commuter’s general mood.
“Something is eating this birdfeeder”.
I did warn you that none of the above had been thought through.
That period is the only time of the year you will really see strangers smiling at each other on the tube. Everyone’s general attitude towards each other did seem to improve.
“Fancy a glass of Badass”.
However at the end of the first full week of this New Year, I sadly report that everything has returned to how it was before the recent mass wrapping of odd shaped gifts. Travel on the tube and you will see faces staring at tablets, books or just asleep. No one will look at anyone unless they really have to. Look down any supermarket queue you will see people muttering and tutting under there breathe because someone is taking a few seconds longer than they should. On the road you will see selfishness everywhere. Innocent cars being forced against their will to undertake or cut in at the last moment, only to end up stuck directly in front at the lights. Take your headphones or earbuds out/off while walking and you will hear drivers all around venting their frustration publicly. Last weekend I was stuck in traffic for possibly a minute (not much more). One person decided they couldn’t possibly wait a moment longer and sounded the horn, this spread like a virus as others joined in. Within seconds a chorus of annoyance could be heard all around. I understand that everyone is in a hurry (I am, always) and need to be somewhere “Now“. But! Come one people; let’s just be nice to each other. Wouldn’t it be great if in 2019 humans were considerate to others, is that such a radically strange idea (if this makes me sound like a hippy, then I’ll gladly put flowers in my hair, wear a cheesecloth dress while dancing barefoot in a field).
“Larry, Curly and Moe”.
I’m not the biggest Crimbum fan, but if flashing lights and decorations badly taped to walls in homes, shops and offices helps calm the general attitude of the population then I’m all for it. We don’t have to do the whole prezzie thing or watch “The Wizard of Oz” or “The Sound of Music” all the time”. If the thought of an obese stranger in a red suit breaking into people’s homes in the middle of the night helps them to feel more relaxed then I’m game. While I think about this, I wonder if the nation’s bosses would allow everyone a little extra time off every week, surely they want happy employees, who enjoy their work. Not getting political here, considering what is currently happening in the UK, I would have thought that some companies might like to spread what work they have over a longer period allowing worker more leave and relaxation time (Now you understand why I don’t manage people or run a business with mad ideas like that) which could result in happier, less rushed or stressed people.
“Seen at Clapham Jct station”.
In conclusion, its official the season of goodwill is well and truly over. However I am going to try over the next 51 weeks to smile more. This could make another person smile, which in turn might lead to others smiling (doesn’t smiling even if you feel like shiz, releases good feeling chemicals).
And Now For Something Completely Different……
“The dancing Wookie”.
A final mention, about public transport this week. Look around trains and stations; you will see two types of adverts dominating all others. One teases far off paradises that could visited in summer. While others make passengers feel extremely guilty about (possible) extra weight gained recently. I’ll let you guess which ones I try to ignore while sucking in my ever expanding equatorial region.
“The Turner prize goes to….”.
Sitting in a corporate coffee shop, I couldn’t put the lid of my flask on due to an excessive amount of cream (now you can know which ad mentioned above, I was looking at). Of course I licked the cream until the lid would comfortably screw on. That’s when I became aware of being watched. A small child was looking and smiling at this strange cat licking so-called adult.
“Getting my tongue right in there”.
I have also submitted another article to DWAS Celestial Toyroom magazine, fingers crossed.
“Trying to write this shiz, while Eric and Ern distracting me”.
My Mid Life Crisis Conts……
This week I have mainly been watching:
“Better Things”, (S1, Pilot/ep 1, ep 2). “Catastrophe”, (S4, ep 1). “Charmed (2019)”, (S1, ep 1). “Click, Best of 2018”, (TX: 05/01/19). “Doctor Who”, (S1, Serial 2, ep 3 to ep 5). “Frasier”, (S8 ep 11 to ep 22)(S9, ep 1 to ep 22)(S10, ep 1 to ep 10). “Horizon, 2016: Wildest Weather In The Universe”, (2016, ep 6, TX: 23/10/16). “How Not To Die”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 03/01/19). “Island Of Dreams”, (Pilot, TX: 03/01/19). “Kate Bush At The BBC”, (TX: 22/08/14). “Les Miserable”, (S1, ep 2). “Midnight Texas”, (S1, ep 5 to ep 10)(S2, ep 1 to ep 9). “Semi-Detached”, (Pilot, TX: 04/01/19). “Storyville Waco: Madman Or Messiah”, (pt 1, TX: 02/01/19)(pt 2, TX: 03/01/19). “The Graham Norton Show: Good Story Guide”, (TX: 04/01/19). “The Morecombe And Wise Show: The Lost Tapes”, (ep 1, TX: 16/10/68)(ep 2, TX: 30/09/68). “Tracey Beaker Returns”, (S1, ep 6). “You”, (S1, ep 7).
This week I have mainly been listening to:
“Brian Gittens And Friends”, (ep 49.75, 05/01/19). “Iain Lee (Bonus)”, (09/01/19). “Iain Lee (Highlights)”, (04/01, 07/01, 08/01, 09/01, 10/01/19). “In Poor Taste”, (ep 101, 08/01/19). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (10/01/18). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (05/01, 11/01/19). “Rule Of Three”, (10/05/18). “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 122, 07/01/19)(EE Rising Stars Special, 04/01/19). “Strange Times”, (ep 286, 05/01/19). “The All New Angelos And Barry Show”, (11/01/19). “Morrissey”, “Bowie”, “The Zutons”, “Franz Ferdinand”, “The Killers”.