Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East, West and South East London (The NEXT Chapter).
Week 215 Saturday 28thJuly until Friday 3rd August 2018.
The streets of London are a battleground of Red, Yellow and Orange. Which rental bike scheme would you or do you use? Travelling by bicycle is fun; it’s easy, anyone can do it. It helps keep people fit, plus in a city like London it’s sometimes the fastest way to travel. I have many fond memories of cycling, such as when my dad took the stabilisers off and I cycled on two wheels for the first time. Or when my friend “The Big Fellow’s” brakes failed on a steep hill with one of the break pad actually hitting him in the face (don’t worry he survived, just!).
“This famous Tea clipper was for once not on fire!”
In recent years there has been an explosion in the amount of people peddling around the capital. This has resulted in cycle lanes on many roads and in the centre of town the infamous Blue Cycle Super Highways which caused a lot of disruption during its construction. Safety is an issue; there have sadly been a number of accidents, many fatal (I was hit twice when I cycled regularly).
“London old and new”.
As I mentioned at the top of this ramble there are a number of different rental schemes available. The oldest and most popular are nicknamed “Boris Bikes” after the “Major of London” in office when they were launched. These bikes are parked in docking stations so don’t cause an obstruction. However recently there has been an invasion of Yellow and Orange bikes which sometimes are found on their own or in rows ready to fall over like dominos when bored school kids on holidays knock them over for shiz and giggles. Important advice, if you ever use a rental bike “wipe the seat with a wet wipe”. I say this as a couple of years ago on “Naked Cyclist Day” (yes it’s a real thing) amongst the procession I saw a couple of rental bikes being ridden by naked cyclist. We are constantly being told that Cycling is not just good for us, but the environment. However I also suspect it’s GOOD for the businesses that are making piles of money out of this mode of transport.
“A lone Yellow Peril, waiting to be knocked over for shiz and giggles”.
In the centre of town the majority of rental bikes are used by tourist (I have no proof other than what I have seen). Cycling Londoners tend to speed around in Hi-Viz clothing wearing helmets with lights and small camera attached. When I used to cycle to work I would do a quick change (superhero style) in the loo before arriving in the office looking hot and flustered after rushing up a number of flights of stairs.
“Calamity, didn’t write this message on the leaf if your wondering”.
As I said I am a fan of cycling, but one thing that annoys me are clearly capable adults riding on the pavement who “tut” and get annoyed when pedestrians who get in there way. Walking beside the North London canal recently myself and other pedestrians had to keep dodging cyclists constantly who didn’t care that they were making things difficult for people out for a walk with prams or dogs. I’m surprised that there weren’t a number of cyclists paddling in the canal. Sometimes I wish I had a broom handle to shove into there passing spokes. But of course this wouldn’t be nice to the broom handle. My bicycle has been in my sisters shed for a couple of years, maybe I should pull it out and start pedaling again. Is the world ready to see me in Lycra? That would definitely deserve a broom handle in the spokes from a passers-by.
“This train couldn’t decide if it was coming or going”.
And Now For Something Completely Different……
“Saw an interesting designer bag. And bought fudge in a shop with Star Wars toys on shelves”.
I’ve always been a cat person, as a child I was terrified of dogs but that’s for another week. Cats have always been very important in my life and still are.
“This cat seen in Ibiza recently was not a “Little Fatty”.
While re-watching “A Street Cat Named Bob” a couple of evenings ago, I became aware of movement on the floor. A cat that my friend and I call “Little Fatty”, because when it lays down its tummy spills around it like a puddle had walked in through the French windows and plonked its large behind on the carpet. “Little Fatty” possibly wanted to get tips on how “Bob” changed a homeless man’s life.
“This week i saw an American old banger, and a lost hat”.
My friend and I looked at each other and then at the cat, who stood up and waddled outside. It’s not a “come stroke me” wanting to be fussed cat, it keeps its distance and can usually be found in the garden under the birdfeeder hoping for free fast food. Because of its size, I suspect even the slowest bird would get away without a problem. The cat is aware that it’s safe when around us and just lies sunning itself when we are in the garden. I thought it was funny that while watching a film about a cat, a cat came in. Apologies for this boring story, it’s tough every week to have interesting content.
“Look in to my eyes, you are feeling very sleepy”.
If you would like to complain about lack of content please contact,
“Pretty coloured dog”.
The small amount of rain which has fallen this week was definitely welcomed by strange people like me, who have recently felt so uncomfortable in the heatwave just trying to do normal daily things. Am I the only person that likes the smell of the air after rain? I sound like a real hippy. I’ll go hug a tree.
“Writing this SHIZ, while playing buses”.
My Mid Life Crisis Conts……
This week I have mainly been watching:
“13 Reason’s Why”, (S1, ep 3). “A Street Cat Named Bob”, (2016). “Click”, (TX: 28/07/18). “Friends”, (S1, ep 22 to ep 24)(S2, ep 1 to ep 16). “Horizon 2018:4, Spina Bifidar & Me”, (TX: 26/07/18). “Leading Lady Parts”, (TX: 30/07/18). “MARVEL: Jessica Jones”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 13)(S2, ep 1 to ep 13). “MARVEL: The Defenders”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 8). “Stath Lets Flats”, (S1, ep 6). “The Big Fix: Inventing The Impossible”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 26/07/18). “The Crystal Maze”, (S5, ep 2, TX: 27/07/17). “The Five Billion Pound Super Sewer”, (S1, ep 3, TX: 31/07/18). “The Last Leg”, (S14, ep 6, TX: 27/07/18). “The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers (Ext Ed Pt 2)”, (2002). “The Real Marigold Hotel”, (S3, ep 1, TX: 01/08/18). “Were Doomed! The Dad’s Army Story”, (TX: 22/12/15).
This week I have mainly been listening to:
Chasing Earhart“, (ep 52, 29/07/18). “Grief Cast”, (ep 26, 07/03/18)(ep 48, 01/08/18). “Iain Lee (Bonus)”, (2x 30/07/18). “Iain Lee (Highlights)”, (26/07, 27/07, 30/07, 01/08/18). “In Poor Taste”, (ep 17, 13/04/15)(ep 52, 05/11/16). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (02/08/18). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (28/07, 03/08/18). “NASA: Gravity Assist”, (01/08/18). “NASA: Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 56, 03/08/18). “Quick Question”, (S2, ep 3 (ep 17), 30/07/18). “Skeptiod”, (ep 616, 27/03/18)(ep 634, 31/07/18). “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 99, 30/07/18). “True Crime Finland”, (ep 26, 27/07/18). “Morrissey”, “The Strokes”, “The Manic Street Preachers”, “Bowie”, “The Cure”, “The Kinks”, “The White Stripes”.