Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East & West London and Surrey (The NEXT Chapter).
Week 192 Saturday 17thuntil Friday 23rdFebruary 2018.
Happy 4th Bday this week to the Jbomb.
I take my auntie responsibilities seriously. Last weekend at Jbomb’s b’day party I was asked to help with “pass the parcel”. The music was queued on my tablet; a group of excited children sat in a circle in front of me. Behind the scenes 2 extra layers were hurriedly being wrapped round the parcel due to additional guests. Luckily the b’day boy’s father had just spent good money on a newspaper. Jbomb’s mum pulled out a couple of these pages and used as wrapping, my brother-in-law said he didn’t want those pages anyway.
“Making a tasty mess”.
My job was to start and stop the music, so no pressure. After the first two children were happily clutching sweets, I realised that I needed to keep track of who was holding the parcel when the music stopped. The pause button was not as sensitive as I would have liked, this might be more to do with my fat finger jabbing away at it and not the tech.
“Slices for everyone”.
The game was going well with a lot of laughing from happy children. When the sausage on the end of my hand pressed pause, Pharrell stopped singing and a little girl started to rip open the parcel. This was when I heard a voice whisper in my ear “She’s already had a go”. Looking at my sister in horror; I realised that I had blown the “ONE JOB” given to me. Thinking quickly I wondered if I could stop the child saying that in fact the boy next to her was holding the parcel (he wasn’t) when the music stopped. Or invoke rule 42 (subsection DS9) that she should have owned up to the fact that she had already unwrapped a layer (these 4 yr old’s are crafty).
“The B’day boy with people he loves”.
The tension was palpable, would there be enough wrapping for every child to be regarded a winner, in 2018 there are no looser (or so they say). My sisters disembodied voice was heard again “let the girl in the pink dress win”. The end of results of the game can be confirmed. The girl in the pink dress was the winner and enjoyed opening the final layer while all the other children looked on jealously. My brother-in-law’s sacrifice was worth it, in our eye’s he was the hero of the morning. And if I am ever asked to referee “pass the parcel” again take more notice of who unwraps what.
“A morning of messy fun”.
My nephew pizza party was a success; Jbomb filled himself with pizza that he had made washed down with squash and ice cream.
“Celebrating a 4 year old in style”.
Special party commendation goes to me, for rescuing Jbomb’s balloon that tried to escape coming to rest in the middle of a busy road on a blind corner. As stated earlier I take being an auntie seriously. He better remember this in years to come when I’m in a nursing home and my bed pan needs emptying.
“Plenty for everyone”.
And Now For Something Completely Different……
A number of weeks ago I mentioned to a manager that my back felt like it was about to snap. After trying a couple of different chairs making me feel like Goldilocks. The manager did a Paul Daniels by producing a back rest from somewhere across the office, I didn’t ask where he got it from but it made my back feel better almost immediately.
“Waiting to go home after another long day”.
Last week a colleague who sits next to me realised after 3 weeks of being back in the office her back was hurting and that “HER” back rest was missing. The looks she gave me as she could see I had a back support. As mentioned earlier I have no idea where the support came from. Other people piped up saying that her chair had been moved while she was away so it was possible that this was hers. I kept my head down and got on with my work while she made it very clear to everyone who would listen that she was unhappy.
“Dressed to see the “non” sexy dentist”.
Over the weekend it was mentioned by a friend who I won’t name **Cough**, “Calamity” that when I returned on Tuesday the support would be gone, I laughed this comment off. I am so glad money was not bet, as my chair was empty and a similar support was draped over my colleague’s chair. What made me laugh at the end of the day she took the support off trying to be stealthy and locked it in her draw? I have never wanted someone to lose a key so much. Don’t worry I am being very brave; with my coat bunched up behind my lower back until the manager can get me another one.
“So what seems to be the problem sir”.
“I wonder if his friend arrived”.
Had to see the dentist (unfortunately not the sexy one) who inserted a temporary filling into my cavernous gob. I did get to say hello to the Sexy dentist, it felt like I was cheating on her seeing a different one but she was all booked up. As expected the temp fell out resulting in an evening trip to a supermarket to buy a sticky white substance that was very difficult to put on my tooth.
“A nice tasty, cold drink in the office is always comforting”.
Drinking cold Tomato soup straight from the can at my desk, it’s comforting when feeling ill.
“Writing this shiz, and the world go by”.
My Mid Life Crisis Conts……
This week I have mainly been watching:
“Big Field: Escape To The Country”, (TX: 18/02/18). “Big Field: Love Island”, (09/02/18). “Big Field: This Morning”, (TX: 02/02/18). “Casino Royale”, (1967). “Click”, (TX: 17/02/18). “Damned”, (S2, ep 2). “Flatpack Empire”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 06/02/18)(ep 2, TX: 13/02/18). “From Ice To Fire: The Incredible Science Of Temperatures”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 15/02/18)(ep 2, TX: 22/02/18). “Good Morning America Visits Star Trek (TNG)”, (TX: 13/02/92). “Inside The new Adventure: Star Trek (VOY)”, (1995). “Marcella”, (S2, ep 1). “Oliver”, (1968). “Star Trek : Deep Space Nine”, (S1, ep 3 & ep 19)(S2, ep 1 to ep 11). “The Archiveoloists”, (S1, ep 1). “The Graham Norton Show”, (S22, ep 18, TX: 16/02/18). “The Last Leg”, (S13, ep 4, TX: 16/02/18). “The Mash Report”, (S1, Winter: ep 6, TX: 22/02/18). “Troy Fall Of A City”, (S1, ep 1).
This week I have mainly been listening to:
“Brian Gitten’s And Friends”, (ep 1, 30/06/16)(ep 3, 10/08/16)(ep 4, 31/08/16)(ep 5, 27/09/16)(ep 6, 19/10/16)(ep 7, 31/10/16)(ep 20 , 09/05/17)(ep 30, 21/12/17). “Chasing Earhart”, (ep 4, 22/07/17)(ep 27, 02/02/18)(ep 29, 18/02/18). “Iain Lee (Highlights)”, (16/02/18). “In Poor Taste”, (ep 92, 22/02/18). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (22/02/18). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (17/02, 23/02/18). “NASA: Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 32, 16/02/18)(ep 33, 23/02/18). “NASA: In Silicon Valley”, (ep 78, 16/02/18)(ep 79, 23/02/18). “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 77, 17/02/18). “The Adam Buxton Podcast”, (ep 64, 16/02/18). “The Chris Moyles Show (Radio X)”, (17/02/18). “The Comedy Club Interviews (BBC Radio4 Extra)”, (ep 1, 13/02: ep 2, 14/02: ep 3, 15/02/18). “Morrissey”, “Oasis”, “Ian Brown”, “The Killers”, “Smashing Pumpkins”, “Viola Beach”, Manic Street preacher”.