Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East and Central London & Surrey (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 178 Saturday 11^th November until Friday 17^th November 2017. 

I have been unemployed for just over one month.  When I was a useful member of society before arriving at the office Monday to Friday I would visited a small indie coffee shop.  At that time there were none of the large corporate coffee giants in the area.  Every morning I was served by a woman who gradually over the months not only started to smile but also conversed.  I say this as when I first visited; her face was completely static as if she was a Vulcan, just without the angled eyebrows.

  “Thank you to the lovely Claire and Moira for making this week bearable”.

As Stated above there was brief conversation.  For the first few weeks all that was said consisted of “hello”, “do you want chocolate on your cappuccino” and of course the classic “see you tomorrow / next week *”.

 “Booted and suited for an interview this week.  Everyone outside in the cold to greet me when i arrived”.

*delete as appropriate.

 “Late in the week, 5.30pm (ish) Surrey is just beautiful”.

Like a child over time further words were exchanged.  In fact when I returned after being away at mums for a week, she actually asked how my trip had been and was mum ok (I don’t remember mentioning mum; I must have, unless the cafe was bugging me).

  “If this was the new interior to the TARDIS, i wouldn’t mind”.

Over time the conversation became quite complicate.  One morning my opinion was sort because the furniture had been moved around.  There was a regular table I liked; all around the walls were lined by shelves full off books.  Each morning I enjoyed a chapter or a few pages of a “National Geographic” book about NASA’s “Curiosity” rover.  If someone was sitting at “MY” table of course I would attempt to shoot laser from my eyes without being obvious as I passed.

 “Early in the week, Essex around 4.30 pm”.

During the last two weeks I have been back a couple of times.  Something I noticed straight away is that a branch of one of the coffee giants has materialised almost opposite. Being a loyal customer to the independent establishment, I ignored the kind offer of buy 15 full priced drinks in order to get one free from the giant.  The smile was wiped off my stupidly fat face immediately after I had walked in, when faced by an emotionless woman waiting to take my order.  Had I fallen down a coffee shop rip in the space time continuum, could the presence the coffee giant have produced a caffeine gravity well resulting in the women’s personality I had got used to being sucked down the drain only to stick to one of London’s many growing fatbergs.

 “Yes i am a fatty”.

Of course I didn’t really expect her to remember me.  I am after all a no one, just another coffee addict.  Though I always order with a smile and take any empty cups back to the counter before I leave.  Next time l’ll try to see if her ears are pointed, maybe she is part Vulcan.  I am determined to get a smile out of her and remember the good old day of Summer 2017.  Yes I am a saddo who needs a job.

And Now For Something Completely Different…..

  “This original Dana Diver drawn on a whiteboard in Mozambique.  The new version made this week and named Misfitscully”.
 
This week my friend Ian said “why don’t you produce some cards for Crimbum”, I’ll be honest at the time I didn’t actually consider this a possibility.  10pm that evening I was making a card from scratch with no idea of what I was doing.  24 hrs later there were 3 designs and a plan to sell them.

  “Making a mess, designing and attempting to be creative”.

As you read this, I have 100 cards being printed which I collect early next week.  A Business Facebook page (have a look for Misfitscully) has been set up, by the time you read next week’s blog Week 179 the cards will be on sale.  If I do manage to sell any, I have ideas for further products.  I am starting to believe that anything could happen.

  “The very friendly and helpful, All Your Business Needs in Reigate, who are printing my cards”.

And Finally…..

 “My friend is fashionable and likes her droids”.

Being nose to nose literally with a guide dog as I picked something up for the owner.

Moaning about how I wanted to sit travelling forward on a train.  But spent the entire journey with a hand shielding my eyes because the sun was too bright.  I had to give in and sit facing backwards.  That will teach me to moan.

My Mid Life Crisis Conts……

 “Writing this shiz”.

This week I have mainly been watching:  

“After Trek”, (S1, ep 8).  “BBC Children In Need 2017”, (TX 16/11/17).  “ BBC How Do They Do That (BBC News Studio)”, (1997).  “BBC TV, VT Dept Crimbum Tape 1979”.  “Chaos On The Bridge”, (2014).  “Click”, (TX 11/11/17).  “I Know Who You Are”, (S1, ep 11 & ep 12).  “James And Jupp”, (S1, ep 4: TX 12/11/17).  “Little Miss Sunshine”, (2006).  “Nile Rodger: How To Make It In The Music Business”, (S1, ep 3: TX 20/10/17).  “Poppies (CBBC)”, (TX 09/11/14).  “Red Dwarf XII”, (S12, ep 6).  “Robot Wars”, (S10, ep 4: TX 12/11/17).  “Serial Killer With Piers Morgan”, (TX 16/11/17).  “Sideways”, (2004).  “Space Craft With Loren Grush”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 4).  “Star Trek (Original Series)”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 9).  “Star Trek Discovery”, (S1, ep 9).  “Stranger Things”, (S1, ep 5 & ep 6).  “The Apprentice”, (S13, ep7: TX 15/11/17).  “The Apprentice: Honest Subtitles”, (S3, ep 7: TX 15/11/17).  “The Apprentice: Your Fired”, (S12, ep 7: TX 15/11/17).  “The Graham Norton Show”, (S22, ep 7: TX 10/11/17).  “The League Of Gentlemen”, (S1, ep 1).  “Top Gear”, (S18, ep 6).  “The Sky At Night”, (TX 12/11/17).  “Travelman In 48hrs in…. (S6, ep 4x: TX 10/11/17).  “Zapped”, (S2, ep 6).          

This week I have mainly been listening to:   “Craigslost (From Dazed And Concicted)”, (ep 12, 29/07/11)(ep 126, 07/08/16)(ep 127, 11/11/16).  “Don’t Quit Your Daycast”, (ep 1, 07/12/11)(ep 2, 15/12/11)(ep 3, 07/02/12).  “Ghost And Me With David Babcock”, (ep 3, 14/11/17).  “Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 19, 16/11/17).  “Iain Lee: TalkRADIO (Highlights)”, (09/11, 10/11/17).  “Iain Lee Old Bits: Barry, 16/03/16”, (14/11/17): “Rhys Thomas, 18/04/16”, (15/11/17): “The Secrets of The Ninja, 03/03/16”, (15/1/17):  “John Lydon, 14/10/16”, (17/11/17).  “In Poor Taste”, (ep 9, 15/02/15)(ep 78, 01/09/17)(ep 79, 20/09/17)(ep 84, 14/11/17).  “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (16/11/17).  “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (10/11, 11/11, 16/11/17).  “NASA Gravity Assist”, (ep 0, 02/11/17)(ep 1, 15/11/17).  “NASA In Silicon Valley”, (ep 51, 20/07/17)(ep 52, 27/07/17)(short 17/08/17)(ep 64, 19/10/17)(ep 68, 16/11/17).  “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 64, 11/11/17).  “The Adam Buxton”, (ep 56, 11/11/17).  “The Bitter Sound”, (ep 22, 03/06/14)(ep 23, 16/07/14)(ep 24, 12/09/14)(ep 25, 10/12/14)(ep 26, 28/10/15)(ep 27, 22/06/16).  “The Bitter Sound: George George And Morris Worthington Smyth”, (pt 1: 09/07/14).  “The DHB Radio Show”, (ep 6, 05/03/11).  “The Mad Scientist Podcast”, (ep 18, 09/04/17)(Roundtable 15, ep 55, 15/09/17).  “The Nick Abbot Habit”, (ep 16, 16/11/17).  “The Rabbit Hole”, (ep 35, 16/11/17).  “Morrissey”,  “The Doors”,  “The Foo Fighters”,  “Nick Cave & Kylie Minogue”,  “Art of Noise”,  ”Artic Monkeys”,  “Daft Punk”.