Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in Northamptonshire, East London and Surrey.

Week 322 Saturday 15^th  until Friday 21^thAugust 2020.

Happy 4th Wedding Anniversary to SAZ and Tim.

First this week the final SNAIL WATCH.

 “Saying goodbye”.

 Earlier this week I said goodbye to Sandra the snail.  Her shell felt solid when i picked her up, she was ready to be realised.  A big question over the last couple of weeks, where to leave her?  Originally my plan was to visit a local park that has knee high grass, an area which doesn’t have (from what I have observed) a lot of people aimlessly tramping around.  In the end I let her go in my friend’s garden beside the base of a rickety old shed.  Once free nothing happened for a couple of minutes, then gradually she emerged fully from her shell (how amazing is Mother Nature) and wondered off slowly into the darkness underneath the shed.

I won’t lie, I was sad to see her go.  However, I feel I did a good thing helping a tiny helpless creature.  These last few weeks I have spent more time noticing what’s on the ground, especially looking for small slightly slimy animals.  Hopefully Sandra will go on to live a happy gastropod life.

 “I met this tiny country bumpkin while out walking”.

And now this…

 “Two of my fave ladies”.

When I visit my mum and sister, I love to spend time beside the canal watching the world go by (probably looking more gormless than normal).  When the rain became like bullets on both days last weekend I made my way to a cafe beside a couple of busy canal locks.  Upon entering the eatery on both days my temperature and contact information were recorded for contact tracing.  This made my coffee and muffin even more satisfying knowing that if there was an issue I could be traced.  Even though I enjoyed looking through the window, nothing tops actually being beside the water.  One day I will take a trip on a boat, I’m sure being on the water is as much fun as beside it.

Even though there was rain in the air I walked back to my mum’s on both day (about 3 miles on Saturday and 5 on Sunday).  After covering my backpack in old plastic bags I stomped my way along country roads/lanes all the time keeping an eye out for cars.  At one point while walking a busy “A” road a car slowed, the passenger leaned out and shouted “you should get a car”, I smiled and waved as they sped away.  What I have learned from last weekend, I need more substantial footwear because I passed a number of footpaths and bridleways I would like to investigate.

 “I needed the energy while walking”.

I really do love to be out and about in the countryside side.  I am already looking forward to my next visit to see mum and my baby sister, but with better footwear.

 “Look closely, you can see it was raining hard in the right hand pic, taken from the cafe”.

Due to the length of this blog, I don’t have time to tell you the following story in detail.  This is a precis….

 “Imagine a little old lady standing inside this old village bus shelter”.

My sister and I spend some time searching for a little old lady (a neighbour of my mum) wearing pink with a walking stick that was making her way to the village chemist.  We found her taking a breather in a disused bus shelter which has become a community book swap/outdoor library.  It was while she was inside the pharmacy that I discovered my sister couldn’t remember her name, this meant during the drive home i steered any conversation away from names.  It was once we were back at mum’s that my sister remembered the ladies name (I don’t remember it).

 “i really enjoyed my walks.  I had to keep stopping”.

If you would like to read this story in full, please send a postcard wrapped around a gold brick with a lemon tied to it, to the following address,

Golgafrinchan Ark Fleet, Ship B                                                                                                    Hold 7                                                                                                                                        Telephone Sanitiser                                                                                                                    Second class                                                                                                                                    G.B.T. 6945679.

 “I really wasn’t dressed for the weather, but i didn’t care”. 

And Finally……

 “Relaxing in the cafe beside the canal”.

In between calls while working from the living room, I was being entertained by Channel 4’s “Travel man”.  During a segment in Florence (Italy) which featured “David” by Michelangelo.  I innocently said, “I didn’t realise how big he was”.  After a slight pause my friend also working in the same room started to laugh.  Honestly, I meant the actual size (17 ft or 5.17 metre) of the statue and not his marble winky.

 “One day i will travel on a canal boat, and operate a lock”.

I noticed that when my niece was playing a game on a tablet her avatar was wearing a mask, I innocently asked “why the mask”?  Without looking up from the screen she replied “Coronavirus! “  I kept quiet and carried on doing old peoples things.

 “An update on the Testicle Brothers growing in the garden.  The picture on the right is the latest, there getting bigger”.

On the phones this week….

 “The invasion has started.  Head for the hills”.

I spoke to a landlady which had new tenants with the family name of Dalek.  As a lifelong Doctor Who i couldn’t help smile and was tempted to ask if their previous address was downtown “Skaro”.

 “Writing this shiz while at work.  At my sisters on the left.  In the living room at my friends house on the right”. 

My Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have mainly been watching:  

“3%”, (S1, ep 1).  “ABC News: Tom Baker Visits Aussie Schoolkids”, (YouTube)(TX: 18/02/79, I think).  “Big Jet TV (Live): From Heathrow Airport”, (FaceBook)(2 x TX: 21/08/20).  “Click”, (TX: 15/08/20).  “Buffy The Vampire Slayer”, (S4, ep 18 & ep 19).  “Confessions Of A Serial KillerWith Piers Morgan”, (S1, ep 2, TX: 01/03/18)(ep 3, TX: 13/09/18).  “FOX 26 Houston: News at 5pm (Central US) With Tom Zizka”, (FaceBook)(TX: 15/08/20).  “Glitch”, (S1, ep 1 7 ep 2).  “Guardians Of The Galaxy”, (2014).  “Not Going Out”, (S10, ep 3 & ep 4).  “October Faction”, (S1, ep 1 & ep 2).  “Orphan Black”, (S5, ep 3 & ep 10).  “Prodigal Son”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 3).  “Red Dwarf: The First Three Million Years”, (S1, ep 1, TX: 06/08/200(ep 2, TX: 13/08/20).  “Semi-Detached”, (S1, ep 3 to ep 6).  “The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 6).  “The Lost Boys”, (1987).  “The Mike Skipper Saturday Lockdown Quiz”, (FaceBook)(TX: 15/08/20).  “The Peanuts Movie”, (2015).  “Top Gear”, (S12, ep 3, TX: 16/11/08)(ep 4, TX: 14/12/08).  “Travel Man’s Greatest Trips”, (ep 3, TX: 14/08/20).  “Van Helsing”, (S3, ep 4 to ep 8).                                    

Doctor Who Watched This Week:

“Battlefield”, (S26, Prod Code 7N)(ep 1, TX: 06/09/89)(ep 2, TX:13/09/89)(ep 3, TX: 20/09/89)(ep 4, TX: 27/09/89).

“Ghost Light”, (S26, Prod Code 7Q)(ep 1, TX: 04/10/89)(ep 2, TX: 11/10/89)(ep 3, TX: 18/10/89).

“The Curse Of Fenric”, (S26, Prod Code 7M)(ep 1, TX: 25/10/89)(ep 2, TX: 01/11/89)(ep 3, TX: 08/11/89)(ep 4, TX: 15/11/89).

“Survival”, (S26, Prod Code 7P)(ep 1, TX: 22/11/89)(ep 2, TX: 29/11/89)(ep 3, 06/12/89).

“Smith And Jones”, (S29 (S3), Prod Code 3.1)(TX: 31/03/07).

“The Shakespeare Code”, (S29 (S3), Prod Code 3.2)(TX: 07/04/07).

This week I have mainly been listening to:  

“Coronavirus Global Daily Update”, (BBC World Service)(15/08/20)(16/08/20)(17/08/20) (18/08/20)(19/08/20)(20/08/20)(21/08/20).  “CNN, Coronavirus: Fact Vs Fiction”, (ep 122, 17/08/20)(ep 123, 18/08/20)(ep 124, 19/08/20)(ep 125, 20/08/20)(ep 126, 21/08/20).  “David Tennant Does A Podcast With….”, (S2, 18/08/20).  “Jonathan Vernon-Smith, Mini Treasure Quest”, (15/08/20).  “Lazy Doctor Who”,(ep 181, 20/07/19)(ep 182 to ep 184, 05/08/19)(ep 185, 25/08/19)(ep 186, 01/09/19)(ep 187, 02/09/19)(ep 188 & ep 189, 25/12/19)(ep 190 & ep 191, 26/12/19)(ep 192, 04/01/20)(ep 193, 11/01/20).  “Mystery Hour”, (20/08/20).  “NASA: Gravity Assist”, (14/08/20).  “NASA: Houston WE Have A Podcast”, (ep 157, 14/08/20)(ep 158, 21/08/20).  “Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (15/08/20) (21/08/20).  “Poppy Hillstead Has Entered The Chat”, (ep 5, 19/08/20).  “Rob Beckett And Josh Widdecombe’s Lockdown Parenting Hell”, (S1, ep 32, 14/08/20)(ep 33, 18/03/20)(ep 34, 21/08/20).  “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 207, 14/08/20).  “The Bomb”, (BBC World Service)(ep 3, 15/08/20).  “The Nick Abbot Habit”, (05/07/19)(15/07/19)(22/07/19)(29/07/19)(17/08/20).  “We Will Get Passed This”, (ep 24, 01/06/20)(ep 25, 02/06/20)(ep 26, 03/06/20).  “What’s The Problem? With Nick Abbot And Carol McGiffen”, (S1, ep 30 17/08/20).  “Morrissey”,  “Bee Gees”,  “The Bay City Rollers”,  “The Village People”,  “The Stereophonics”,  “The Strokes”,  “The Black LIps”,  “Moby”,  “The Vaccines”,  “The Charlatans”,  “James”,  “Echo And The Bunnymen”.