Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East and South West (Inc Kew) London, Surrey and Essex (Hyland House) (The NEXT Chapter).

Week 271 Saturday 24^th until Friday 30^thAugust 2019.

Since January apart from holidays and special occasions I haven’t drank alcohol. I thought that more and more people were choosing to not drink the hard stuff. But look in most supermarkets and you’ll find it’s not easy to locate the small amount of shelf space with non-alcoholic drinks. Some people decided to go down this route for health reasons, others for fitness or people like me who just fancied saving a few pennies and hoping to lose weight (more about that later).

“A bloody hot bank holiday Monday”.

One thing I have noticed is that there is very little difference in taste I don’t feel I’m missing anything. Because of drink I have met lovely people, with many happy memories and experiences. But there are several incidents that I am still mortified by; these include the time I was in my sister in laws car. Or when I missed my young nephew by millimetres as I projectile vomited outside his school (sorry Thomas). Plus the advantage of a 100% alcohol free drink is I can drive and have a sip or two (not at the same time of course).

“I love a pretty bird”.

Price tends to be the same. That was until I visited Kew Gardens on Bank Holiday Monday this week. The small bottle of water in my bag was warm and not refreshing. Standing in one of the many food stalls around the gardens, l worried that I might need the use of a defibrillator after I saw the prices. All the 330ml cans (the size of a standard can cola) of non- alcohol or alcoholic drink cost just over £5! While a normal can of pop was £2.80, there were cans of water (yes, water in a can) for £1.80. Due to the heat of the day, the tills were continuously busy. Next time I visit I will pop in to the small express supermarket situated near the tube station and smuggle my own supplies inside. On a positive note, the gardens are spectacular and well worth a visit.

“Taken from the balcony in a hot house, on a very hot day”.

Back to the non-alcoholic drink. I am enjoying drinking them; one of the main advantage is that the next morning I don’t wake up feeling like I’ve been bit by a gold brick with a slice of lemon wrapped around it and covered in sick.

“Found free water at Kew, handy to know for next time”.

And Now For Something Completley Different……

“Not a lot to say, its a Pagoda in London”.

I sometimes sit at work and wonder what it would be like if I had an attack of amnesia. What would it be like to completely forget something?
Earlier this week I needed to speak to a manager sitting a couple of feet across the desks. That’s when I didn’t know his name, I looked at his face but I just couldn’t remember his name. He saw me looking so I was honest, luckily he found this funny, but I really had no idea of the name I use most days. I could almost feel areas of my brain desperately trying to reconnect with each other, it was as if a plug had been pulled out and the signal couldn’t reach the receiver. I told him he looked like a Steven or Andrew!

“The glass houses have a cathedral”.

It was only after i restarted talking to the customer that my memory snapped in to place, “Peter”!. No, the customer didn’t have the same name. Hopefully this is not the start of brain deterioration, the family have healthy ones. I must be ok because I can I still remember in the correct order all the companions that have travelled with the Doctor. Or quote my favourite obscure “Monty Python” sketches. It’s really been a very busy couple of week, my brain was just having moment.

“That’s more money from the Tooth Fairy”.

A Diet Newsflash……
I haven’t bored you recently about how the diet is going (its all content). You may remember a few months ago i started a low carb diet. At the time of the Sri Lanka trip a few weeks ago i had lost just over a stone and a half. However, during the 7 days in away i gained 5lb, it’s not all my fault I kept being give tasty food! (It would have been rude not to have eaten everything given to me).

“Seen at Hyland House, Essex”.

At the start of this week i reached the pre holiday weight and have actually now at the time of publishing this shiz lost a further two pounds. It’s slow progress but I am shrinking. More exciting updates soon!

“MOZ, knocking dowing this is one!”.

Scare Of The Week……

“I spent a lot of time at Kew looking up”.

Sitting at traffic lights with a car in front and another on my left. I suddenly saw in the rear view mirror a fire engine flashing both red and blue lights as well as its siren blearing. The image of the engine got bigger and bigger as it raced towards me. At the very last moment (or so it seemed) it swerved to the right and passed at speed on the wrong side of the road (the junction was clear due to the traffic lights).

“Emmmm, even more planes”.

Of course, I knew they weren’t going to hit me, London fire brigade drivers/crews are so well trained. But I can’t lie, nearly shizzed myself.

“Don’t worry its a glass sculpture, not a monster after the plane”.

And Finally……
Heard a woman say to her friend as she climbed out of a car. “Careful I can see your Onion bagel!

“Loving the return of Fizzgig”.

My Mid Life Crisis Conts……

This week I have mainly been watching:
“Arena: Cindy Sherman #Untitled”, (TX: 28/07/19). “Better Than Us”, (S1, ep 1). “Building Cars: Secrets Of The Assembly Line”, (ep 1, TX: 20/10/15)(ep 2, TX: 21/10/15). “Celebs On The farm “, (S2, ep 1, TX: 26/08/19). “Click”, (TX: 24/11/18, rpt 24/08/19). “Dexter”, (S2, ep 8 to 10). “Doctor Who, The Invisible Enemy”, (S15, ep 1, TX: 01/10/1977). “Fear The Walking Dead”, (S5, ep 11). “Final Space”, (S2, ep 10). “From Dusk Till Dawn”, (S1, ep 4). “Haters Back Off”, (S1, ep 1 to ep 6). “Horizon: Cannabis Miracle Medicine Or Dangerous Drug?”, (2019, ep 6, TX: 28/08/19). “Kathy Burke’s All Women”, (S1, ep 3, TX: 29/08/19). “Legion”, (2010). “Lucy And D.i.C”, (S1, ep 4). “Mercury 13”, (2018). “Mission Control The Unsung Heroes Of Apollo”, (2016). “Mortimer & Whithouse: Gone Fishing”, (S2, ep 5, TX: 30/08/19). “Pandora”, (S1, ep 7). “Red”, (2010). “Stacey Dooley Face To Face With The Arm Dealers”, (TX: 29/08/19). “Stath Lets Flats”, (S2, ep 2). “Step Up To The Plate”, (S1, ep 6, TX 19/08/19)(ep 7, TX: 20/08/19). “The Dark Crystal: Age Of Resistance”, (S1, ep 1 & ep 2). “The Great British Bake Off”, (S3 (S10), ep 1, TX: 27/08/19). “The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice (S3 (S6), ep 1, TX: 30/08/19). “Toy Story 4”, (2019). “Wu Assassins”, (S1, ep 2).

This week I have mainly been listening to:
“30 Animals That Made Us Smarter (BBC World Service)”, (S1, ep 23, 26/08/19). “Brian Gittens And Friends”, (ep 63, 27/08/19). “Daddy Look At Me”, (S1, ep 13, 29/08/19). “Iain Lee (Highlights)”, (26/08, 27/08, 28/08, 29/08/19). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (29/08/19). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (24/08, 25/08, 30/08/19). “NASA: Gravity Assist”, (23/08/19). “NASA: Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 107, 30/08/19). “Rule Of Three”, (22/08/19). “Space Boffins Podcast: TheNaked Scientist”, (08/11/13) (10/12/13) (10/01/14) (10/02/14) (10/04/14) (10/05/14) (10/06/14) (10/02/17) (10/03/17). “Soundtracking With Edith Bowman”, (ep 157, 30/08/19). “Strange Times”, (ep 313, 26/08/19)(ep 314, 27/08/19). “The Angelos And Barry Show”, (26/09/18). “The Nick Abbot Habit”, (26/08/19). “Morrissey”, “Echo And The Bunnymen”, “Black Grape”, “Happy Mondays”, “The Stone Roses”, “Petula Clark”, “Aerosmith”, “The Coral”, “Beck”, “Oasis”, “Erasure”.