Misfits Mid-Life Crisis Adventures in East & Central London and Northamptonshire (The NEXT Chapter).
Week 171 Saturday 23 rd until Friday 29 th September 2017.
The following might appear to be a little more relaxed and chilled than normal. This is because I have been out of the big smoke, wondering country lanes and fields of Northamptonshire visiting my mum and one of my sisters.
“I want to ride through that tunnel”.
Arriving at Euston Station after work on Monday my heart sank when I discovered that every train was delayed. I managed to squeeze my large ass onto an already packed train and escaped London with relative ease in the end. Euston station always makes me feel nostalgic because I worked there for 18 months towards the end of the 80s. And have fond memories of making “occasional” trips to the basement bar where i would see one or two other patron rushing that final pint, before they sat in the front of a speeding train “up north”. Who am I to judge?
“Met some lovely ladies while out and about”.
I love to being away from the capital, the air is fresher even with the whiff of manure floating around it smells so much better than most of London. People appear to be kinder, they nod, say hello, good morning. Coming from London I’m used to the fact that you don’t look at others, and definitely never EVER talk to another person unless you want to receive a mouthful of abuse or be splashed in the face with acid.
“This canal vent is over 150 years old”.
While away I walked a couple of miles each day to the canal where I would write this shiz or drew like a 4 year old using colour pencils. Everyday a random car would stop and a kind smiling local would ask if I wanted a lift, the only time that this would happen in London is if the driver was aiming a gun or attempting a kidnap. There could of course be an ulterior motive for this countryside friendliness. I did have images of waking up in a basement handcuffed to a pole wearing a gimp suit with a ping pong ball stuffed in the mouth while a cow licked my leg. I’m not suspicious of others honest, living in London hasn’t affected me one bit.
I should mention that even speeding drivers are kind in the countryside. Walking country lanes there were times when I would have to step into the verge covered in stinging nettles without a lot of notice to allow cars to pass. I noticed drivers would wave “thank you“. Thinking about it they might have actually just been showing me the finger or “the coffee beans hand gesture”. It’s difficult to tell at speed.
“I spent hours watching boats go up and down”.
Being away I made a daily pilgrimage to a local petrol station for a Starbucks (it’s from a machine, it’s not a proper Starbucks) I am an addict remember. These last few days have been for relaxing, restful and regenerative and other things starting with the letter R.
“I did clear up the mess, honest”.
And Now For Something Completely Different……
“Gotta love nature”.
Have you ever chased after a bus as if you were in an action movie, last weekend I did. Last weekend I couldn’t find my plastic wallet in my pocket or bag, forget the Oyster card it’s my Starbucks card that I was worried about. Without asking I handed Calamity my bags as I turned on my heels and ran.
“Making friends, and drawing badly”.
The bus stopped at a crossing at the top of the hill. This gave me the opportunity to speak to the driver and explain my predicament. Once back on the bus I looked around and under the seat I had been sitting on and saw nothing. Meanwhile behind me other passengers were attempting to alight, but my large arse was blocking the exit. It was then I panicked and rummage deeper inside my bag, which was when I saw my pass. Stepping off the bus I felt like a total plum especially when I saw that my poor friend carrying all the bags and remembering that she had struggled up the hill with a bad foot for no reason. She was clearly not impressed.
And In Other News……
“Thanks to these lovelies for a great few days”.
Heard a woman say ” I can feel my holes” as she massaged her earlobes.
Saw a horse rolling on the grass, which in my opinion was enjoying its self. I grabbed my camera, stood up and aimed. The horse was standing staring straight back at me…..bastard.
“I lay on the floor in the dark, while Iain Lee played the radio, so much fun”.
My Mid Life Crisis Conts……
“Writing this Shiz”.
This week I have mainly been watching:
“60 Day’s In Jail”, (S2, ep 12: TX 25/09/17). “60 Day’s In Jail…. From Inmate To Officer”, (short 1 & 2). “Alien Covenant”, (2017). “Astronauts: Do You Have What It Takes?”, (S1, ep 5: TX 24/09/17). “Black Lake”, (S1, ep 1). “Click”, (TX 23/09/17). “Egypt’s Great Pyramid: The New Evidence”, (TX 24/09/17). “Phillip K Dicks: Electric Dreams: Impossible Planet”, (S1, ep 2). “Precision The Measure Of All Things”, (S1, ep 3 : TX 23/06/13). “Rellik”, (S1, ep 1). “Serenity”, (2005). “Star Trek IV The Voyage Home”, (1986). “Star Trek The Next Generation”, (S2, ep 19 & ep 20)(S3, ep 3 to ep 7). “Strike – The Silkworm”, (S1, Story 2, ep 2). “The Crystal Maze (2017)”, (S7/S1, ep 9). “The Golden Girls”, (S4, ep 9 to ep 12). “The Great British Bake Off”, (S8/S1, ep 5: TX 26/09/17). “The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice”, (S4/S1, ep 5: TX 28/09/17). “The Insider: Reggie Yates: US Jail Guard”, (S2, ep 3 : TX 27/09/17). “The Sarah Jane Adventures”, (S1, ep 1 & 2)(S3, ep 5 & ep 6)(S5, ep 3 & ep 4). “The Space Shuttle: A Horizon Guide”, (TX: 24/07/11). “Without Limits: Vietnam”, (S1, ep 1: 14/09/17)(S1, ep 2: 21/09/17).
This week I saw live:
“Light’s Out”, (With Iain Lee, At Big Green Bookshop).
This week I have mainly been listening to:
“Houston We Have A Podcast”, (ep 8, 25/08/17)(ep 9, 08/09/17)(ep 10, 15/09/17)(ep 11, 22/09/17). “Iain Lee: TalkRADIO (Bonus)”, (21/09, 22/09, 2x 25/09, 2x 27/09, 2x 28/09/17). “Iain Lee: TalkRADIO (Highlights)”, (21/09, 22/09. 25/09, 26/09, 27/09, 28/09/17). “LBC Podcast: Mystery Hour”, (28/09/17). “LBC Podcast: Nick Abbot (Whole Show)”, (23/09, 29/09/17). “NASA Silicon Valley”, (ep 60, 21/09/17)(ep 58, 07/09/17). “Quick Questions”, (ep 1, 14/07/17)(ep 2, 24/07/17)(ep 3, 21/07/17)(ep 4, 07/08/17)(ep 11, 26/09/17). “Strange Times”, (ep 233, 15/09/17)(ep 41, 29/12/14)(ep 40, 21/12/13)(ep 39, 16/12/13)(ep 38, 07/12/13)(ep 37 & ep 36, 03/12/13)(ep 35, 17/11/13)(ep 34, 10/11/13)(ep 33, 26/10/13)(ep 32, 13/10/13)(ep 31, 05/10/13)(ep 30, 29/09/13)(ep 29, 23/09/13). “Strange Times: ExtraCRAP”, (#11, 21/12/13)(#10, 10/12/13)(#8, #7, #6, 19/11/13)(#5, #4, #3, #2, 07/10/13)(#1, 10/10/13). “The Adam Buxton Podcast”, (ep 49, 24/09/17). “The Angelos And Barry Podcast”, (28/09/17). “The Rabbit Hole”, (ep 28, 28/09/17). “Morrissey”, “The Coral”, “The XX”, “The Courteeners”, “Moby”, ”James”, “Stereophonics”.